Wednesday, October 16, 2013

First Archimpressions: Dead or Alive: Dimensions

 .... wow.

 I've been playing fighting games for my entire life, it is my favorite genre after all, but I swear to god, none as stupid as Dead or Alive: Dimensions. For starters, I've never been a fan of their fanservice-centered female cast, they are shallow characters that wear stupid clothes, trying to target various "moe" or fetishes, and the core fanbase that they have developed eat it all up. Seriously, I've been to the Gamefaqs DoA forum and it's filled with perverts discussing the most inconsequential, and sadly, most notorious fanservicey features, like the photos. I digress, why is this game so stupid? Chronicle Mode. It aims to tell the story from DoA 1 to DoA 4 I believe, but it's so bad. Dialogue is cheesy, cutscenes are cheesy, and while the story makes sense, inside it's context, it's really dumb. Characters are dumb and borderline incestuous(Kasumi towards Hayate?), the situations they are put in and how it develops is even sillier. And the cutscenes? Jesus christ, they go from CG to fully animated to... characters standing still over voice overs? There's no transition between fully animated and the "stills", and it gets jarring and annoying real fast real soon.
 Sadly, what attracts me to the series is the gameplay. DoA is a very pick-up-and-play fighter, the strings are much easier than Tekken's and the system is much friendlier than Virtua Fighter, so it's easy to get other people go play and do decently. And the gameplay is pretty spot on, which is really cool. The camera angles on the heavier hits is really satisfying, so props to it. The 3D looks very good, but at the cost of FPS, I dunno about you, but I prefer my games silky smooth, so I won't be playing much in 3D.
 I'm really tired, but before hitting the sack... why is Hayabusa such a prick? Also, slapping Kasumi? Since when did Hayabusa hit women?... Well, all the time, but this was uncalled for, it was not a fight... I think they might've ruined Hayabusa, no wonder the new DoA went in a different direction.

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