Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Now Playing: Painkiller - Hell & Damnation

 All pain and no killer.
 Painkiller is one of my favorite games ever. Ever. And they went and screwed it up!

 Where do I begin? Let's start with what you can find out before starting the game: Only thirteen levels. The original release had about 25 levels. This game is, supposedly, a pseudo-remake of Painkiller and its first expansion, Battle out of Hell, which added 10 more levels. Do the math, the game is missing over half of the total stages. And if you want more levels? You gotta buy the DLC packs. SERIOUSLY????

 And then you start up the game... the graphics are hideous. Sure, they're a step up from the original game, but then again, that game is flippin' old. There're a few framerate issues every now and then too, which is inexcusable considering how bad it looks. I can either play the good looking, for its time, original game at a fluid 60 fps or play this new, horrible looking, for its time, remake at 30 fps.

 And they also screwed up the game's eponymous weapon, the Painkiller. Back in the PC original, nothing felt more crunchlingly satisfying than using the razor-sharp shredder Painkiller, but in this game it's like cutting through butter: No feedback, no crunchiness, no oomph.

 At least the game is still Painkiller, and it feels, mostly, like Painkiller.

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