Game #963: Dante's Inferno(PSP)

  Nothing more sinful than double dipping.

 It was only last year I believe that I finally played Dante's Inferno, and I quite liked it, so it was only a matter of time before I'd decide to double dip with the PSP port. Since both games are basically the same, I'll only expand on a few key areas about what's different or what wasn't so enjoyable a second time around.

 As for key differences, it's marvelous how Artificial Mind & Movement managed to fit the game into the PSP, a console that's almost as powerful as the PS2, which was the weakest of its generation. The graphics were scaled down significantly as it was to be expected, and it doesn't look as good as a game made specifically for the PSP would, but it gets the job done and the framerate is relatively smooth, most hiccups being a result of the game loading something or a few specific levels that are a bit too intense for the PSP. That said, a few segments, mostly the ones in which you ride a monster, were turned into awkward cutscenes, but I'm guessing if you didn't play the original you wouldn't know you were actually watching pre-recorded gameplay.

 Gameplay is basically the same, weak and strong scythe attacks, ranged(and overpowered!) cross attacks, saving and damning baddies, etc, however, a few moves were cut completely, including the overpowered magical armor power. They were probably removed so that you'd only have four spells and no need to remap those buttons, probably. The Holy/Unholy trees were, as a consequence, shortened, so it's much easier to max those levels... and thank god, because having to constantly mash the circle button to 'Save' or 'Damn' enemies was already a bit annoying, but mashing buttons doesn't feel as good on the PSP, not that it was ever a fun mechanic, I'd much rather kill enemies with my normal combos, but having to perform the mashing mini-game so that I could strengthen my weaponry and gain access to more moves isn't so much fun. Artifacts got removed too, but to be honest, there were barely a few of those I actually cared about using in the original, so no big loss if you ask me.

 Some areas feel a bit shortened, but I'm not a 100% sure of how many, the final boss is one phase short, and the eight circle was simplified. In the original it was a series of rather challenging challenges, at least a few of them, now they were turned into simple fights against wave of enemies. The final wave is incredibly brutal, I died on that battle more times than I did throughout the entire game. Sadly, this means that the latter levels feel just as bland as they did in the original, Dante's Inferno shines when you are battling, exploring and platforming, when it's wave after wave after wave of enemies the game loses its edge.

 The game itself plays well for the most part, but I feel like the hit boxes on the L+X attack are a bit off, like only the last few stabs actually count as attacks? I'm not sure, but that move sure as hell was suspect! Dodging is done by pressing L+R alongside a push of the analog stick which works relatively well I thought.    

 Now then, I don't know if Dante's Inferno is a good fit for a handheld game, since as I mentioned before I don't really enjoy mashing buttons on a handheld, but I feel like it's a decent conversion. I don't think the cuts hurt the overall game too much, and the gameplay felt pretty good even if a few elements don't flow as well as they did on the home console original.

 7.0

Game #962: Batman Begins

  ...but when does it end? Whennnnn does it eeeeend?!

 I know I'm not the only one that enjoyed Batman Begins way back when, but I think the movie came out during the period I was phasing out of gaming since I'd only learn about the videogame years later. It's no Batman Arkham I'll tell you that, but maybe there's nothing to be scared of.

 It seems I can't escape from stealth games, because Batman Begins is equals part stealth and beat'em up. It follows the plot from the movie, and we get a sparse few scenes between levels, they are very short, but hey, they are better than nothing. I usually avoid writing about graphics, but for a licensed game this one looks like a first party title. Character models are fair representations of the actors, while random mook npcs look way more detailed than they should! On the other hand, animations are very exaggerated, so it might look a bit weird, and some of the attack animations are spotty to say the least. Heck, the first time I saw Batman climbing stairs I actually laughed 'cause of how silly his flailing arms looked. Speaking of jarring, beating the game unlocks three costumes, the modern black and grey and two versions of the classic grey and blue, but they look a bit out of place in this gritty reimagining of Batman.

 Armed enemies can end you in a few seconds, something that Batman Arkham would replicate years later, and since they are dangerous they are marked in red on your radar, so that you know who to take out first. In order to safely take out armed enemies you'll usually have to partake in simple stealth, platforming and very basic puzzle solving that involves throwing batarangs at any highlighted object. There's a 'fear' mechanic, but all it involves is, well, hitting specific objects with the batarangs to scare enemies, because once they get scared they just throw their guns away and NEVER think about picking them up again. It's dumb, it really is, but hey, it's the game's puzzle element and it's not too bad a reason to have you, the Batman, skulking in shadows. On the other hand, other times you'll just have to sneak behind them and slowly take them out stealthily.

 So, armed enemies are now disarmed but they spotted you, so in comes the combat element and... it's passable. You have a punch, a kick and circle that performs context sensitive actions, such as a 'defense breaker' gut punch that has a lot of wind up so that other enemies can hit you as you prepare it. And you can't cancel out of it. Enemies love to block a lot, you can't really pick who batman will target and landing hits doesn't feel particularly crunchy... but, y'know, it gets the job done. Super basic, kinda clunky, but passable.

 There are two Batmobile sequences and they were actually rather fun. Checkpoints don't restore the batmobile's armor so you cold find yourself in tough spots, like when I had to take down 12 police cars but my health was almost gone so I had to be extra careful and couldn't just ram them from behind. That aside, they play well, the controls work and they are exciting.

 If the game has any major issues is that it can be kinda boring at times. Combat is unexciting and stealth is slow paced, and if you die you'll sometimes have to sit through scripted sequences you absolutely must wait out in order to stealthily take out your enemies. There are too many dull 'interrogations' in which Bats grabs and enemies and then... you press square, wait for Batman to say something threatening and the victim says nothing of use and then... you rinse and repeat until they say something useful and you can finally press circle to end the sequence.

 Batman Begins is, unlike the movie, nothing to write home about, but at least it's decent, y'know? So much so that I'm kinda disappointed that the much superior The Dark Knight didn't get its own videogame! So yeah, I think fans of the movie and fans of Batman could get a few kicks out of this one, it's definitely above most movie licensed games of its era.

 6.0

Game #961: Dragon's Lair Trilogy

  A never ending QTE.

 Dragon's Lair is a game that has always held some of my interest, because it was considered a classic and the animation looked really good. Plus, princess Daphne is still one of the sexiest animated women ever created, and you can quote me on that. But I never had the means to get an actual, physical, port of the game... until I heard about the Wii port, Dragon's Lair Trilogy. Well, I finally played it as well as the other Don Bluth games, Dragon's Lair 2 and Space Ace, and.... they were disappointing in some ways, but met my expectations in others.

 The thing about these three games.... is that they aren't really games. They are one long QTE section, as you must press the right button at the right time in order to progress, otherwise your character will face a gruesome death and you'll be forced to play the segment again. Playing these games at the arcades must have been such a chore! Plus, the reaction times these games require is borderline insane at times, so only memorization could get you through them. In this port you can set lives up to Infinite, why you'd want anything else is beyond me. You can also change the QTE inputs to appear on the bottom of the screen, on the correct edge or to hide them completely.

 Dragon's Lair 1 let's you play in either Home or Arcade version, the Home version has a few extra scenes and every room is played in order. In the Arcade version, upon dying, you'll restart in a different, random room. Most rooms have a mirrored version just to pad out the length. The game lets you change the difficulty, but even the easiest mode sometimes required split-second reactions.

 Dragon's Lair 2 let's you play either the original release or the Director's Cut, which features a new ending. There's no extra padding, but the difficulty has gone way up, with some very hectic scenes. As a side note, I adored how insane this one gets as Dirk travels through time, it's one amazing acid trip.

 Space Ace features a new hero, Ace, who must also save a sexy girl from an evil villain. All three plots follow the same structure to be honest, but it features a twist.... The game features a lot of alternate scenes because you don't need to 'Energize' and transform from young Dexter into the muscular Ace. It's about as hard as the second one, and the adventure can get quite crazy, which I liked.

 So... I'll be honest, I didn't like these 'games'. I hate QTEs, and games made out entirely of QTEs are boring. Sometimes the time window for your input doesn't even feel fair. Thankfully, all three games include a Watch Mode in which you can watch all three games in their entirety. And that's a fantastic addition, because this 80's animation is top-notch. Every game lasts about 10 minutes, and they are a fun watch. That said, you can't customize Watch Mode, so no Director's Cut for 2 and Dexter will energize every single time in Space Ace, but, y'know, I'll take what I can get.

 If I were to judge this collection as games... I'd score them a 3. Boring 'gameplay', unfair timing, very repetitive...  But as a package, a package that includes Watch Mode as well as a few extra for each game? I'm not gonna lie, I enjoyed watching all three shorts. Well, I played the first one in it's entirety, tried the second one and then decided it'd be more fun for me to just watch them. So yeah, I feel like I got my money's worth out of the 'game' even if most of the time I spent it watching.

 7.0

Game #960: Tenchu 2 - Birth of the Stealth Assassins

 Now THIS feels like a proper Ninja simulator.

  Tenchu was a'ight, a'ight? Y'see, I came to that game with a big 'thing' going on against it.... the only Tenchu game I had ever played before was 3, so in many ways it couldn't stand up to my memories of that game. Tenchu 2: Birth of the Stealth Assassins fares much better on the account that they improved much.

 The first thing that caught me off-guard was how much bigger the story element got. We've got fully voiced cutscenes between stages, and both Ayame and Rikimaru get their own unique scenes, although a few are shared. This is a prequel to the first Tenchu, Ayame and Rikimaru look really young, and it introduces an unlockable third playable character, Tatsumaru, the third Azuma Ninja disciple, who gets his own story mode too. Rikimaru and Ayame get 11 missions each while Tatsumaru gets 7. While some missions are shared, every character gets a different objective and enemy placement, as well as some unique bosses for each character, making playing as every character a very different ordeal!

 The graphics are much improved, it no longer feels like you're treading in absolute darkness, even if there's still quite a big of 'fog'. Characters and environments feature a ton more detail, and we get new assassination animations. The game still features tank controls, but combat is a bit smoother, and we even get new techniques, such as evasive steps, long jumps or hiding underwater. Of course, now there are even more Ninja tools you can take into your missions. Going back to the combat, the game features more impressive bosses, so the slightly tightened combat makes it more fun to fight them. It's still not perfect, and some hitboxes are a bit suspect, particularly Tatsumaru's, but you'll be slashing at thin air much less than you did in the first game.

 They tried to make the grappling hook better, so that now it only shoots towards edges, but... if you're not standing at a perfectly parallel angle with the edge you want to grab you WILL fall down, to the point that grappling hook-heavy stages could be a bit annoying. Thankfully there's no fall damage and there are very few bottomless pits. On the other hand, when you get your angles right and you zip around from platform to platform it can feel so cool.

 This game features a mission editor, which I'll admit I didn't care about to even try it, but from what I've read it was pretty well received.

 I had fun with Tenchu 2, much more than I thought I would. Inside my nostalgia-filled brain Tenchu 3 is still superior, but I'll guess we'll have to find out provided I have the time this year. In the mean time, this was a fun stealth/action game, and the stronger emphasis on the narrative made it more engaging than the first. It's still a bit rough around the edges, your movement speed is a bit too slow for my taste and I wish I could see further in front of me, but considering the hardware... I think they did the best they could.

 6.5

Game #959: Syphon Filter

 Before Nathan Drake, we had... Gabe Logan. 

 I remember Syphon Filter. I never actually played the game, but it had a pretty aggressive marketing campaign so it was impossible not to come across ads on the Xpert Gamer and GamePro magazines. Billed as a Metal Gear Solid killer, the game certainly had good press as it received two sequels on the original Playstation. As such, it's finally time to see what Syphon Filter was all about.

 Well, I'll tell you this, for a PS1 game, the third-person shooting works really well. L2 and R2 strafe, and you hold down R1 to aim at an enemy and shoot with the square button. It works well and it was... it was quite fun. You also get a roll with the circle button, and this game might've created the predecessor to regenerative shields and health, for y'see, there's a 'Danger' gauge that increases as enemies shoot at you, and your health will only go down after the Danger gauge is full. It's an interesting mechanic, and don't think for a minute that this makes the game easy because... oh boy.

 You also get first-person shooting if you hold down the L1 button, and it works relatively well... now, if only the game would SAVE my options so I wouldn't have to un-revert up-and-down aiming every time I loaded my game..... You can crouch down by holding down X, which also works as the walking button, and roll with the O button. Switching weapons is a bit more uncomfortable. Either tap select to change to the next weapon or hold down select and use R2 and L2 to navigate your inventory.

 The weaponry in the game is fun, shooting feels really nice, but I want to give credit to the taser. Thing is so strong if you hold down the fire button.... enemies will eventually catch on fire. Brutal. It has limitless ammo, however, you are rooted to the spot, so other enemies can shoot at you while you wait for this one enemy to fry.

 Sadly, the game falls apart everywhere else. For instance, there's a lot of PS1/N64-era logic when it comes to completing levels. Some buildings make no sense whatsoever, so you'll be climbing on top of anything and everything trying to figure out where to go. Did you know the final boss can only be defeated with a gas grenade? There's no hint, no nothing, no way to know or tell that that's how you are supposed to beat him. And he shoots grenades. Grenades can end you immediately.

 And what about the flashlight mechanic? I was stumped for like 20 minutes on the first level. Turns out I had a flashlight in my inventory and I had to use it to find a switch. This was not the last time I'd have to go into the inventory, unequip my gun and equip a flashlight to find a little something that is hidden inside the pitch-black Ps1 shadows. It's bullshit. Stages have multiple objectives, and if you get to the end without clearing every objective.... good luck, now you have to retrace your steps all the way to the very beginning. This can be particularly annoying on the cathedral stages. Man, the latter stages can be bullshit.

 But the worst part about the game were the stealth sections, because the game has no proper stealth mechanics. Sometimes you are supposed to kill enemies, but if you tase them from the wrong angle it'll count as being 'seen' so you have to restart the section. And Checkpoints are far and in between. I wasted so much time on these awful, AWFUL stealth stages that I just used the stage select cheat and never looked back.

 So... Syphon Filter... I'll tell you this, everything involving shooting down enemies is absolutely great, a bit tough, but fun. But everything else? Level design goes from decent to poor, the stealth sections are terrible and some of the mechanics, like the flashlight, haven't aged very well. In spite of that, I'm looking forward to the sequels, for whatever reason, I'm hopeful that they'll have removed the flashlight and either axed or tweaked the stealth sections. I hope.

 5.0

Game #958: Hyrule Warriors - Age of Calamity

 I hate time travelling shenanigans.

 It's no secret that I didn't like the original Hyrule Warriors, so I took a gamble when I decided to get Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity. Thankfully, that gamble paid off because Age of Calamity fixes most of the issues I had with the original, if not all of them.

 The game was marketed as a retelling of the war that came before Breath of the Wild. And if you're gonna make a Warriors game out of BoF this period made the most sense. We'd finally get to see how the four champions died and Calamity Ganon took over Hyrule. Except not really. This game is an alternate dimension, something the trailers don't tell you. A mini-Guardian travels back in time, and the time travelling only gets worse from there. Heck, in this dimension Link gets the Master Sword much later than in BoF's flashbacks, and the rocky relationship between Link and Zelda is nowhere to be seen, as they are good friends from the very first moment. Is it neat to see the previous champions interact between each other? Yeah, it's pretty cool, since we mostly got to meet them through flashbacks in BoF... but considering we get a happy ending because this is NOT the prequel they were selling... that's lame.

 Dumb time travelling garbage aside, the gameplay is really good. Age of Calamity focuses exclusively on BoF's world, so the cast from the original Hyrule Warriors got scrapped entirely. There are about 18 characters, although Link can equip three different movesets and Zelda gets two. Every character feels very unique, aided by the fact that the ZR button works very differently between characters. For instance, there are two Zora characters, Mipha can press ZR to dive into the ground and come out of water geysers she can place with her strong attacks with an aerial attack, while the other Zora character gets this unique mechanic in which if you press ZR at the right time after a strong attack you'll get an even stronger attack. So, while you'll be doing a lot of Y-button mashing, characters really do feel different and trying them out was fun. Of course, this also means that you'll love playing as some and hate playing as others.

 The game itself is your standard Warriors/Musou fare. Weak attack strings with Y, end said string at different points with the X button for different Strong attacks, and you also have a Super gauge for your Super moves. In this game you take up to four characters, depending on the level it might be less, with you, and can swap at any time, as well as direct your characters to move to specific places on the battlefield.

 To aid yourself in combat, you have two different inventories, R and L. Holding the R button lets you use runes: Magnesis, Bomb, Cryonis and Stasis. To add some flavor to this, every character uses them in a different way. Link is the most vanilla and just uses the rune, but, for example, Mipha performs a strong X attack after using stasis, or Zelda can mash Y to stack light orbs and then press X for a massive attack. Most of the time, Link's basic use proves the most useful, but hey, sometimes you can dash-cancel the secondary action other characters perform. Enemy generals, AKA the enemies with the health bars, have different attacks that, if you use the right rune, will make the weakness gauge appear. But there's nothing stopping you from using runes at any moment. Stasis is particularly useful since you can use it as soon as you see the weakness gauge appear to land some free hits, and Bombs can, most of the time, damage the weakness gauge directly. On the other hand, the L button inventory has magic rods, Fire, Ice and Thunder, and they usually make the weakness gauge appear on bosses so they are massively useful... but have limited uses per battle.

 Thankfully, bosses are much easier to take out than in the original Hyrule Warriors. The weakness gauge is not a necessity to kill a boss, so if you miss your chance with the right rune... no biggie. Plus, the game shows you which rune you need to use and when, so if you miss it's 100% on you. Much better than trying to remember which item to use and when. But even if your reflexes are awful, there are more ways to make the weakness gauge appear, such as using the elemental rods, using air attacks, dodging attacks... or performing perfect dodges, by dodging JUST before you get hit, which will give you an opening to deal massive damage to the weakness gauge. Taking down bosses is not a chore this time around. They still soak up a bit too much punishment, but I prefer this over the alternative.

 There are no extra modes, like the awful Adventure mode from HW. Every main story stage and every challenge stage just pops up in the map. Eventually the map will get filled with icons, since you upgrade your characters by activating different icons in the map, provided you have the necessary items. And while it could be a mess, by tapping R on the map screen you can get a menu-based stage select, in case you need it. It's still not the most elegant menu around, but it's not terrible.

 An interesting little thing in the game... there aren't many alternate costumes or colors. The four champions can equip or unequip their blue capes, and Zelda can pick between her white dress or her winter clothes(For whatever reason the basic blue-shirt costume she uses throughout most of the game can't be selected later in the game), however, Link gets pretty much every costume piece he had available in the original Breath of the Wild. You can even change their colors if you activate the Dye Shop!

 Age of Calamity doesn't crack my top 5 Warriors games, however, as far as I'm concerned it's a massive improvement over Hyrule Warriors, and I was finally able to have as much fun as I usually have with the Warriors games.

 8.0

Game #957: Sphinx and the Cursed Mummy

  It's a Zelda!

 One game that frequently makes it into PS2's top unsung gems, as well as top worst game-breaking bugs is Sphinx and the Cursed Mummy, but it never quite caught my attention since I wasn't digging the artstyle. Regardless, as someone who adored the PS2 generation I was bound to give it a whirl someday... and so, here were are.

 What's interesting about this game is that it's a mix of Zelda and classic Gameboy Wario gameplay, yeah, you read that right! Most of the time is spent playing as Sphinx, in which the game plays like a Zelda-lite, kinda like Beyond Good and Evil. You've got a few areas you can visit and travel, areas have optional mini-games and optional puzzles that may reward you with optional upgrades such as a larger wallet or a piece of a golden ankh(Collect 4 for a new health piece!).... but as you go through the main quest you'll eventually get Canopic Vases, and you'll be transported to where Tuttankhamen, the cursed Mummy, sleeps, to play a bit as him. The mummy can't be killed, but much like Wario, it can change states. Get burned and now you can burn things, get flattened and now you can go through metal bars, get electrified and now you can activate special orbs. I thought I was gonna hate the mummy bits, but... man, those puzzles were fun! To the point that I'm a bit disappointed his levels are so short!

 One thing that threw me off a bit is that the game is a bit tough at first. It's only for a few hours, but before you get the double jump, Sphinx's basic jump's arc is a bit weird so platforming can be a bit harder than expected. And Sphinx's initial life points leave very little leeway for mistakes, add to this that save points feel very sparse and in between before you're given more freedom when it comes to exploration. But after the first few stages you'll get more health points, more convenient access to save points as well as the double jump that should fix any issues you could have with platforming. 

 The puzzles in the game are just right, both for Tut and Sphinx. No puzzle is hard enough as to require a guide, but they are complex enough to get you thinking, which I think made them just the right amount of challenging. The combat, only Sphinx gets it, is passable. You get a sword to attack with, and a bit later in the game a shield, but you'll use it mostly to solve a few puzzles. Enemies aren't too tough, but a few get some invincibility frames when initiating their attacks which might throw you off until you learn how to fight them.

 The one mechanic that REALLY sucked is monster capturing. There are two types of monsters you'll need: Bombs and Fire Armadillos. Bombs are, well, bombs, and the Fire Armadillos are needed to burn a few wood structures. The only way to get these monsters is to capture them with Beteles, and this is either boring or annoying. For starters, you start with 20 Capture Beetle max capacity. Now, you have to find a place where these monsters spawn.... and wait for them to slowly respawn and capture them. Bombs are easy enough, just use the Beetle and move it towards the bomb monster.... but Fire Armadillos? Oh no. You have to carefully attack them, WITHOUT killing them until they flash yellow, and then, and only then, use the beetle. Oh, you have to dodge its attacks. And you also have to wait for them to respawn. Trust me, nothing would be worse than getting to an area where you need either of these and not having them. And the game is never kind enough to spawn these creatures on areas where you need them, so you'll have to backtrack at least one area away and get a few to progress. Annoying.

 One thing to keep in mind, there's a nasty bug the second time you play as the mummy, if you use the second savespot and either turn off the system or die and restart.... you won't be able to progress through the game.

 After playing Sphinx and the Cursed Mummy I understand why it's so beloved, as the game is really fun and it's an interesting blend of different game mechanics. The monster capturing mechanic is dumb, it is, but the rest of the game works relatively well. The game ends on a massive cliffhanger.... and I wouldn't mind seeing a sequel.

 7.5

Game #956: The Grinch

  Who needs Christmas anyways? Halloween is where it's at!

 While I couldn't care less about Jim Carrey's The Grinch flick, because by the time of its release I had already outgrown his comedy, for one reason or another I wound up with The Grinch on PC, and I loved it. Hearing it had a PS1 port I had to get it on my collection.

 It's a sort of collectathon kind of platforming game. It's made up of four worlds and each world has a different set of missions, such as defacing 10 posters, hitting 10 shorts with thimbles or replacing a cake's candles with fireworks. You don't need to finish every goal to unlock the next world, but in the long run you'll probably be finishing most objectives since you'll need to unlock more gadgets to clear certain objectives, and in order to unlock gadgets you need blueprints and blueprints are usually hidden next to objectives.

 You'll never be able to finish a world the first time you set your foot on it, which I think is fine... but the final stage requires you to backtrack to all four worlds to finish a new objective. This new objective is usually in plain sight, so it's not like it's too much of a hassle, but still... On the other hand, I didn't really finish the game because I couldn't find every Submarine blueprint, and the final stage requires the submarine. It's not that I hated the game, au contraire, I felt like I already got my money's worth and I didn't need to aimlessly backtrack through every world until I found this miserable blueprint.

 The Grinch has an interesting assortment of moves. From the outset you get a butt pound and a bad breath attack, as well as the ability to switch to and play as Max, his dog. Collecting blue prints unlocks the bad egg launcher, the slimer, a rocket-assisted jump, a climbing octo-pack and, lastly, the infamous submarine I couldn't finish. There are very few hints after the first world, but using my head a bit eventually led me to the solution of most puzzles. Unluckily, it couldn't lead me to the missing blueprint.

 On the other hand, sometimes figuring out the solution can be a bit boring, and some of the levels can have some clunky or poorly thought-out segments. For instance, world 3, the dump, you constantly need to hit switches to turn off the electric gates, and then jump up a tube using the rocket jump, and do it under a time limit because while you be going back and forth through these gates, you can't turn them off completely. From this very same stage, there are some poles you need to spin on in order to connect tubes, but if you happen to spin on the wrong direction... nothing will happen, and you won't realize why you can interact with these poles. Vaulting over poles was poorly implemented altogether.

 All this years later I still think that The Grinch is a good platforming game, which is surprising considering it's just a licensed game Konami probably threw together in a few months. I wouldn't say it's accurate Dr. Seuss' story nor to the movie, since I haven't watched the latter, but it's a fun game nonetheless.

 7.0

Game #955: Lost Planet 3

  The only thing that's lost here is its identity.

 It seems that Capcom never really knew what to do with the Lost Planet franchise, because Lost Planet 3 is yet another complete overhaul of the series.... and it wouldn't be the last. More akin to the first one rather than the sequel, being a narrative-focused third-person shooter. A lot has changed, to the point that it's pretty much Lost Planet in name only... but is that really a bad thing?

 Lost Planet 1 was quirky, for lack of a better word. It looked like a generic third person shooter, but you had these weird mechanics, like having to fight for T-Energy as not to die due to the cold or having the roll mapped on L3. You also got a grappling hook and there were mechs, not to mention how heavy everything felt. I really liked it. Lost Planet 2 wanted to be the Monster Hunter of Lost Planet, so they threw the narrative out the window and now the game was based around short, goal-based stages which sometimes ended on fighting giant enemies. There was a plot, but it was super disjointed and had not real, proper, characters besides having factions fighting each other. And then came Lost Planet 3, which did with most of the quirkiness away, turning into a much more generic third-person shooter, with a very strong focus on its narrative as well as some Metroidvania elements.

 At least the story is decent. Predictable, a bit generic space soap-opera of men VS the environment VS an evil corporation, but it wasn't horrible. It helps that Jim Peyton, the protagonist, is super likeable. Unlike most gruff action heroes, or heck, even adventurous heroes such as Nathan Drake, Jim is just a guy that means well and wants to do his job to help his family... and anyone else that needs a hand, because he is simply a good person. His appearance is very pleasant too, he ain't supposed to be the most handsome or the toughest guy around. Some of the other secondary characters, like Gale, Mira, Braddock and Laroche grew on me too. So yeah, overall, I'd say the narrative was enjoyable even if it's nothing outstanding or ground breaking..

 Gameplay is where things have changed the most. T-Energy is no longer required to survive EDN-III, but instead, it's now a form of currency you can use to buy new weapons and/or upgrades for them. The grappling hook is still here... but it's now context sensitive, you can only use it on very specific places. While the game is story-driven, now there are sidequests, because you can tackle your objectives at your leisure. If you want to explore the planet, as far as your tools allow it, feel free to do it. If you want to go from main objective to main objective and avoid all the optional content... you can do so too.

 Rolling is no longer a Monster Hunter-like maneuver, it's been much more streamlined and tied to the X button. It's still a core part of the game and you'll need to dodge incoming attacks if you don't want to get hurt, but the timing is much more lenient. So while it's still a core element of the shooting... it feels quite different. You can also take cover behind certain objects now, as some of the alien life forms can shoot at you. Lastly, there are not VSs in the game, instead, since this is a prequel, you drive a RIG, its predecessor. VS and Rigs are, for all intents and purposes, mechs, but the Rig is much larger than the VS and built for exploration, so no guns. Not to say your RIG won't see any action, as now driving your mech is done in first person, and you'll be able to block incoming attacks, grab enemy limbs or punch them with its drill arm... or even drill into them if you get the opportunity. VSs were something that you sometimes got to drive in the original games, but the RIG is now a core part of the exploration element of the game, so you'll spend a lot of time on it. Thankfully, it's fun to use, and you get a few.... interesting tunes to listen to while you pilot it.

 Lastly, the combat itself is fine. You can carry up to two weapons with you as well as your infinite-ammo gun. There's a decent variety of Akrid, the enemy alien lifeforms, to fight, a few that can even shoot at you. If anything, maybe the weaponry was a bit boring? I tried a few other weapons, but I stuck with the Assault Rifle and Shotgun throughout most of the game because they worked well enough and the other weapons fell a bit gimmicky. 

 I think the worst part about the game is that there were a few 'Mash X not to die' QTEs that weren't much fun, even the final boss had a few of these.

 Lost Planet 3 didn't feel like Lost Planet, it really didn't.... but I still had a lot of fun with it. The narrative kept me invested on the characters and the gameplay was decent enough to keep me interested in what I was doing. It's not the most memorable or original third person shooter out there, but hey, I feel that the game does everything it set out to do pretty well.

 7.5

Game #954: Megaman Zero/ZX Legacy Collection

  Should I pronounce that like "Zix"? Or like "Z" "X" ?

 I grew up with Megaman 3(Although I knew it as Rockman 3). I adore the X series. But for my money, the ones that look the coolest are Zero and ZX, which is why I'm starting with Megaman Zero/ZX Legacy Collection. I've very fond memories of the Zero series, I discovered it during my GBA roms highschool era, one day I came home, downloaded the new roms and... 'This plays a lot like Megaman! It's so cool! BLOOD!'.... and some time later I'd discover it actually was Megaman. As for the ZX series, I really liked them back when the DS was my favorite system, I may not have specific memories, but I liked them a lot. 

 I'll start with the Zero series, since all four Zero games are pretty much identical. These games are hard. Like REALLY hard. The rock-paper-scissors system got completely axed, in its stead we get elements, Lightning, Fire and Ice, as well as Cyber Elves to enhance Zero's abilities. But hey, you'll only get your Chips and your EX attacks IF you finish boss fights with high ranks, making these already hard games EVEN harder. Doesn't matter if you cut your teeth with the X series, these games are 2-D platforming hells.... which is why this collection offers two options to make your time with the game easier: Easy Scenario and Checkpoints. Either can be turned on or off, so if you just want the checkpoints for convenience but would like to suffer for your victories you can simply toggle on checkpoints and ignore Easy Scenario. As for me, I toggled both options on because I'm a dirty casual.

 Honestly, I feel like the Zero series is TOO hard to be fun, and I'm sure many would disagree, but I don't care. Regardless, turning on the coward's options made me able to enjoy these games.

 On another note, you can toggle between different versions of the game, like say, Rockman Zero. Not many people know, but the localizations for Rockman Zero removed blood. If you want blood, you can play the Japanese version... provided you don't care about not being able to understand what's being said.

 That's that when it comes to the Zero series, now onto Megaman ZX... I'll start mentioning that you can use Easy Scenario AND checkpoints in both ZX and ZX Advent, but it's not necessary, as these games are about as hard as the original X series, feeling much fairer. These games were released on the Nintendo DS, so.... they did their best to incorporate both screens. There are many layouts available, in my case I opted for the one that goes on the lower right of the screen on TOP of the screen you're playing in, but transparent, and you can toggle it on or off with a button. You can opt for a smaller play screen and have this second screen on the side or below, but I preferred a bigger play area.

 I used to love the original ZX back then, since it turned Megaman into a Metroidvania, not only was the world interconnected, but you could turn into different forms based on Zero as well as the four guardians from the Zero series, each form bestowing you with different abilities, like an aerial dash or free underwater movement. It's so cool!

 That said, there's a tiny problem with ZX, one that I remember having back when I first played it.... the map is useless. It shows you what areas are connected but not how, so you might have to try every door inside an area before you get to where you want to be. Not to mention that some areas are more than one screen long and others aren't, so you might have to constantly pause the game to make sure of where you are. And it's even worse when a mission says 'Get to J-1'. Who knows where J-1 is? And the name doesn't help because J-1 is NOT connected to the I area. It makes no sense! To the point that eventually I refused to play without a map in hand. This map issue is REALLY bad, this is a Metroidvania, exploration is the name of the game and the game shouldn't have this issue.

 ZX Advent is a bit better when it comes to the map, but you can only see the map when you are using a few specific forms, which is lame. It's more useful than the map in ZX though. The gameplay is basically the same, but now your character can, besides transforming into different Megaman forms, transform into the bosses. In some ways, you have more tools to play around with... but I thought bosses were kinda lame, I would've preferred having more MegaMan forms since those look cool. I always found it kinda silly how your character actually transforms into the boss, so in a way, so if you're playing as the boy you get get the female voices when transforming into female Megamen, and if you're playing as the girl you get male voices when transforming into the male Megamen.

 The story in ZX Advent I felt wasn't as interesting as the one in the original game, and the two new protagonists were a bit generic. The whole Megaman war could've been an interesting angle, but it's quickly forgotten and thrown into the wayside. And while gameplay is certainly a bit better, since we have a better map and even more abilities to play around with.... I just didn't find this game as memorable as the original, it's missing some of its charm I guess.

 After going through this collection I discovered that.... I think I've outgrown the Zero and ZX series of Megaman. These games have the best art direction in the entire series I think, as Zero and the Megamen look very stylish, but I feel like the Zero series is too hard for its own good and the ZX series had great ideas that needed more polishing.

 7.5

Game #953: Tenchu - Stealth Assassins

 I did like a Ninja... and cheated my way through. Sue me.

 I'm delving into PS1 classics now with Tenchu: Stealth Assassins. While often highly regarded, my only experience with the Tenchu series were with the third game, which I adored... and I played using cheats every single time. I'm not good at stealth games, OK? Something that this game very quickly reminded me. Thankfully, Tenchu came at a time when Cheat Codes were a thing, so even stealth-impaired people such as me can have fun with it.

 The game is made up of 10 missions, and you can play as either Rikimaru or Ayame. Rikimaru favors strength, while Ayame favors speed. The game is so clunky that pretty much either option is fine. If you cheat your way through, like I did, missions will be pretty brief... even though you're given no instructions whatsoever most of the time. 'Kill the Merchant'. Fine, but where is him? That's for you to find out by exploring through the stage. There's no radar, so your only help is a Ki-hint that shows you how close an enemy is to you. From which direction? Who knows. What this means... is that the game requires patience. You must explore slowly and carefully, heck, level 3 is laden with traps, just so that you'll fall to your death for going to fast. Clearly, this isn't my kind of game. I'm trying to scratch off as many games from my backlog as I can before I'm forced to work on my Uni's final project, so sue me for taking the easy way out.

 Before each mission you are allowed to pick from various tools, and there are plenty of fun stuff, like a poisoned rice ball, call traps or even grenades. I think there's a lot of depth with the fun stuff you can do to your enemies, so it deserves praise in this aspect. Independent of these, you'll also bring a grappling hook with you, and it's actually fun to use, if a bit clunky. Clunky keeps being the key-word when it comes to this game, as future games, at least Tenchu 3, would make it much simpler to use the grappling hook to move around. But hey, considering it's a PS1 game, it works relatively well. These items can be replenished either by finding more on the mission or by getting good ranks. Good luck, I just used cheats.

 But if an enemy catches a glimpse of you you'll have to do battle and... combat is very clunky. Combining the Square button with different directional inputs on the digital pad will produce different attacks, which is kinda neat, but it's easy for you AND your enemies to just miss strikes. And moving is ALSO fairly clunky, since it uses tank controls, so repositioning yourself after you went over your enemy with your attacks is a bit of a chore. It's just clunky, y'know? And for as cool as most bosses look, they can tear through your health bar in seconds, and bosses are mandatory fights, no stealth-killing your way through them. In other words, it's a hard game, and a lot of the challenge comes from how clunky it is.

 It may sound like I was harsh on the game, but leaving its age aside... Tenchu has a certain je ne se quois that made it endearing to me. I don't think I'll be playing this one again, but I'm glad I gave it a go.

 5.0

Game #952: Urban Chaos - Riot Response

  A game glorifying police brutality... Oh boy, thank god this game came out so many years ago.

 Well, one game that very often makes the rounds on PS2 hidden gems is Urban Chaos: Riot Response, a game that had a premise that sounded a bit boring... but the game is much better than what you'd think. 'A first-person shooter in which you play as a cop trying to take down a gang of pyromaniacs' sounds pretty dull, but thanks to tight gameplay the game is more than memorable.

 The game is made up of 11 main missions, as well as a few unlockable ones. While you play as a cop, this is a first-person shooter through and through, 'arrests' are made by tasing enemies into unconsciousness, no need to handcuff them or anything, but even your allies tell you that 'arresting' them is an excuse to get the press off your back, because, in a now-ironic twist of fate, the more brutal you are.... the better. Bashing an enemy to death will make the words 'BRUTAL' show up on screen, and landing headshots, which many times may make the head of your enemies explode, is rewarded too. Basically... the police set-up is a very thin coat of paint, you are actually more akin to Robocop. And I'm not gonna lie... landing shots on enemies feels very satisfying, the core shooting elements feel fantastic, there's a sense of weight to enemies getting shot down... and I loved it.

 One of the best things about the game is the reward system. Each mission has five optional goals: Find five masks, Arrest X amount of enemies, Don't use a continue and land X headshots as the medal-rewarding missions, and the fifth one being arresting a special enemy, which unlocks the optional missions. Every X amount of medals you gain will reward you with bonuses. More health, a better riot shield, stronger weapons, more ammo clips, etc. On the other hand, clearing Optional missions will unlock better weaponry for you to start missions with. In the end, you'll be doing your best to clear these optional goals, as the rewards are worthwhile.

 This game sticks to the classic FPS formula, that means no regenerating health. There are no health packs, so to speak, however, in every mission at some point you'll come across a medic that will facilitate you up to three full healings. You'll also be aided by other cops and firemen, and most of the time you have to protect them. It doesn't feel like a escort mission because they'll only join you for so long, so it's not too bad.

 This game's main gimmick, and one I think works well, is the riot shield. As a member of the elusive T-ZERO unit, basically Robocop but made of flesh, you get a Riot shield that you can use to protect yourself from bullets and molotovs. Using this shield becomes an integral part of gameplay, and I thought it was done well, as it adds something unique to the game. And enemies are fast enough as not to make it like you can just shield yourself from any and every incoming damage.

 Cutscenes were filmed with real people.... ugh.

 Overall, Urban Chaos was pretty fun. Not the most interesting story or premise out there, but the gameplay is real tight, and the guys behind it would eventually go on to make the fantastic Batman: Arkham series.

 8.0

Game #951: DmC - Devil May Cry Definitive Edition

  I just love dying on these lonely hills.

 And today's hill is DmC: Devil May Cry Definitive Edition, hated by fans, adored by little ol' me. I stand by what I wrote 5 years ago, so I'll write a few comments about things I still liked and about the new changes.

 Firstly, I forgot how much I liked the game's plot and characters. Yeah, I went there. Dante(Or Donte, as I call him affectionally) starts out like a jerk, but by the end of the game develops into a good-natured jerk. I loved Kat and her relationship with the brothers, and I also loved the relationship between Donte and Vergil, to the point that I think I prefer these versions to the mainstream ones. I know, I know, but I felt like these characters were interesting and their personalities went beyond 'look how cool/badass I am'. I also liked the plot itself, it's a pretty generic dystopian plot, but I think they executed it well. On the other hand some of the dialogue can be downright cringy with how hard it tries to be edgy. That said, I think the dialogue lands well most of the time, but when it doesn't... oh boy. Another thing of note, this rerelease updated the ending a bit, making it a bit... cuter, which I liked more than the original ending.

 There were a few new additions to the gameplay, but most of them are optional. You can lock on to enemies, my biggest gripe from the original and... I failed to take into account that holding down a button to lock onto an enemy might not work so well when switching weapons is done by holding down other buttons.... but they took it into account, and you can make the lock-on work either by tapping R1 or by holding it down. Neat. Bloody Palace was added for both Dante and Vergil, you can play in Turbo mode, which makes the game 20% faster, and you can also activate a few modifiers, mostly making the game tougher. But the best part about this rerelease? 60 glorious FPS. It might not look 'better', but it sure as hell runs much better.

 I run into a weird bug one time when I got 'stuck' with Angelic weapons, meaning, the game was behaving as if I was holding down L2, and nothing I did could swap back my weapons. I quitted the special mission and it fixed itself.

 I wanted to play this game's DLC, but as per usual, I'm firmly against DLC... thankfully, this rerelease includes Vergil's Downfall, a 6-mission expansion to the original game. Vergil play very differently, and he gets his own story. Most cutscenes are told via poorly animated hand-drawn art, but it's not too bad. I didn't like playing as Vergil as much as I did in the original DMC 3 or as much as Donte, he feels more limited, but I appreciated having a brand new set of tools to mess around with.

 I wouldn't go as far as to say that this rerelease is leagues above the original, it really isn't, but I think that I appreciate the game a lot more than I once did, which is funny considering I was one of the few that actually liked it way back when. I love the characters, I like how they executed the story and I think there's merit in its very simple but fun combat. Regardless, I think this is a great game and loved every bit I spent replaying it, and while the new ending only adds a few seconds worth of scenes... I think it makes it superior to the original.

 9.0

Game #950: Dirge of Cerberus - Final Fantasy VII

  Final Fantasy VII hasn't been Final since a few Fantasies ago...

 Final Fantasy VII is my favorite game of all time, there's a reason I sing its praises every chance I get. It's also why I hate every single spin-off, because Squeenix was quick to squeeze the cow that kept on giving, but it seems that every time they try to expand on FF VII they make it worse. It's why I like FFVII in a vacuum, as the world it has developed is anything but interesting, flanderizing characters such as Cloud who is emo in Advent Children while he was always very uppity and sassy, or how they make the story worse, such as introducing clones of Hojo and Sephiroth in Crisis Core, thus cheapening the original characters. I try to make every 50th and 100th game be meaningful to me in some way, be it hype or memories, so why not delve into Dirge of Cerberus - Final Fantasy VII for entry number 950?

 A third-person shooter starring optional actually-angsty hero Vincent Valentine? It's Shadow the Hedgehog all over again! I doubt anybody asked for this game to exist, least of all me, so my expectations were at an all time low, plus, reviews weren't kind to this game. And yet.... And yet.... I actually liked it. I'm not saying it's amazing, but... I had fun most of the time I actually got to play the game, for you see..... Let's just say that the tutorial represents the game in a nutshell. Y'see, first thing I did was drop into the tutorial, it made sense and it was completely optional, and the game spent like 10 minutes to teach me how to move around. 10 minutes to teach me how the left analog stick moved my character. I'm not kidding. The game has you running around, moving the camera around and then doing both for over 10 minutes. It's like a tutorial for babies.

 And then you start the game itself and eventually you'll get to play. Eventually, because sometimes cutscenes go on and on and on and on. And it'd be one thing if the script was actually interesting, but the plot is so boring. It delves into Vincent and Lucrezia's past while also introducing new characters, mostly villains from a group called 'Deepground'. The new characters are so boring, Shelke and Shalua particularly, and for whatever reason the game tries so hard to sell you on Shalua, but she's such a generic 'broken bird that learns about true companionship' anime character archetype that she only comes off as boring. It doesn't help that her voice acting is particularly dull. And the script can be so needlessly melodramatic, like Vincent saying he was like a stone lying in the middle of a river and what not. So you are left with a ton of endless, boring cutscenes. I don't think even the original Final Fantasy VII, an RPG, had as many lengthy unplayable scenes. And avoid triggering the secret ending bit, because it has not-Sephiroth(Genesis) in it, and not-Sephiroth is one of the worst things to ever happen to FFVII.

 On the other hand... I loved seeing the original cast of characters in PS2-era graphics. Sure, Cloud, Tifa and Barret only have CG models, and Red XIII only gets 5 seconds of screen-time, but it was still very satisfying. The game also brought into the PS2-era a few basic enemies as well as a few key locations, like Nibbleheim's manor.... to the point that it made me wish we had received a proper, real remake during this era instead of the pompous stealth-sequel that we got on the PS4 era. But I digress, what matters is that this game looks amazing, with very detailed character models and a surprisingly consistent framerate.

 Well, I did mention I had fun with the game, didn't I? For as basic as the mechanics are, I found it a fun third-person shooter. Vincent is not the most nimble character ever, but moving around while aiming and shooting felt pretty decent. You can also use magic or a somewhat sloppy melee attack combo. You can equip up to three different gun configurations and cycle between them while you fight. Yes, gun configurations, while the game offers you a Gun, Machine Gun and a Rifle.... you could equip three rifles and be on your way.

 For you see, the game offers a surprisingly fun customization system. You can upgrade your frames(Gun, MG or Rifle) and each one has three different routes you can upgrade them in(Power, Speed, All-rounder). Then there are different parts you can attach, such as scopes or accessories to boost different parameters, as well as a magic slot. Tailoring your guns towards your playthrough was a great idea, and I wasn't expecting something like this in a third-person shooter spin-off from FF.

 The game is divided into 12 chapters, and after each chapter your amassed experience points can be used to level up, and increase your basic stats, or turn them into money, in order to upgrade your weapons. Chapters are not too long by themselves, but if you factor in the cutscenes... oh boy. Stages are very simple, sometimes you might get optional, bonus objectives, such as trying to protect a group of NPCs, but nothing too complicated, nor are there puzzles to solve, it's very straight-forward game. That said, early in the game they shoe-horned a pretty bland stealth section in which you play as Caith Sith. It's boring, it's dumb and it's clunky, but it's mercifully short and you're NEVER forced to do it again, making you wonder why they even put it in in the first place.

 As someone that love Final Fantasy VII but hates its spinoffs... I'm surprised to say that the one that received the least critical acclaim was the one I liked the most. I think it has to do with the fact that most of the new story is inoffensive if not very boring, but the simplicity of its gameplay made it a relatively fun time waster... at least when I actually got to play it.

 7.0

Game #949: Disney's Hercules

  Ah yes, a classic 9. L .G. , a 90's Licensed Game.

 I'm not the biggest Disney fan, but I've a small Animated Disney movies marathon planned for one of these months, regardless, they have two movies I absolutely adore: 101 Dalmatians and Hercules, no wonder I love being strong so much. But I digress, Disney's Hercules is one of the games that convinced me that, despite having grown up as a Nintendo kid, the PS2 was the way to go, since I played a bit of it at a friend's birthday, and since the PS2 was backwards compatible... sign me up.

 The game lasts about two hours, and it covers the entire movie, we even get a few clips which was pretty cool. It's a very pretty 2-D action game, albeit using 2-D sprites over 3-D backgrounds, and trust me, it's quite a looker. Just the first boss' fantastic defeat animation shows you how much they cared about making Hercules into a videogame. Most of the scenes that could be adapted into a videogame were, and they took some liberties with others, overall I'd say it worked. I want to single out the Hydra fight as one of the best things this game did, as the fight is true to the movie.

 On the other hand... control can be a bit clunky. If you get hit while on air you won't be able to swing your sword, and if you get hit mid-animation it gets cancelled. Hercules' movement is a bit floaty, and for whatever reason you're give the option of punching things...but why would you when the sword is much faster and reaches further? Interspersed through the game are a few stages in which Hercules is constantly running forward and you have to dodge left and right. By themselves they are fairly mediocre, but as breathers every now and then they were alright.

 The game is a bit challenging. A bit very challenging. Everything and everyone is out to murder Hercules, to the point that some damage seems completely unavoidable. To add insult to injury, the save system is downright diabolical, you can't save your game unless you find the four well-hidden mystery password urns. You don't get to save onto your memory nor do you get a password unless you find them in a stage. And I thought Crash 1 was bad about saving.... And don't try to play the game on easy, otherwise the game will cut short before its final two stages. Lame!

 Disney's Hercules hasn't aged very well, but when I look at this game as a whole... I think it's very charming and I also feel like it did a great job at adapting the movie. I mean, it makes more sense if you have previous knowledge of the movie, for example, the Medusa fight just comes out of nowhere, no context, no nothing, but the rest of the game feels more cohesive.

6.0

Game #948: Dead or Alive 5 - Last Round

  This is me putting my money were my mouth is.

 Last year I wrapped up my opinion on DOA 6 by wondering why I'd want to play 6 when I could just as easily get Dead or Alive 5: Last Round and get more bang for my buck, so me, being a man of my word, decided it was the right time to delve back into the world of Dead or Alive 5. Also, I just checked, and it seems I played 6 back in 2019... dang, how time flies by!

 I'll start with the roster, as this game features a whopping 34 characters, opposed to 6's 24. If you were to delve into DLC you could get another 2 characters, but DLC is for suckers. Not only do we get 34 characters, but most characters have at least 10 costumes. And getting them is quite easy, just finish Arcade, either single or tag, with the characters you want to unlock costumes for. Easy as pie, no hassle, no drag. And hey, if you are a pervert you are in luck, as girls get tons of dumb bikini costumes. Speaking of perverts, this is the game in which Marie Rose originated from, and boy does she make me uncomfortable, she's clearly designed as a teen, her proportions are clearly much smaller than the other characters, yet she is supposedly 18 years old, that way they can sexualize her as hard. I won't lie, she makes me a biiiit uncomfortable. But, even assuming she wasn't sexualized so badly, she is still a child character in a fighting game, and these characters are insufferable. The one thing I'll complain about, content-wise, is that the game still lets you know you are missing costumes and that they must be 'downloaded', just to try to trick you into wasting money into more fetishistic costumes. But hey, to each their own.

 I know I harp very hard on DoA's overly sexualized content, but it's only because I think the game is really fun. DoA has some of the fastest and most fluid looking attack strings in the genre, and the counter-move is pure genius, letting newcomers and experts have fun, look flashy and look stylish. It's an incredibly fun series of fighters that has such a low entry-barrier that you can pop in the disc and have fun right away, even if it's your first time playing the game. I'll defend DoA's gameplay to the very end, this is a hill I'm willing to die on.

 The game crashed on me more times than I would've liked, which wasn't very fun, but I never lost any progress and the game loads so quickly that it was barely an issue, but it's still worth mentioning.

 Well... I was right. DoA 5 is a much better product than DoA 6, and a much better game too. I promise, there's a very fun fighting game hidden beneath all the smut.

 8.5

Game #947: Devil Kings

 Look how they massacred my boy....

 Devil Kings is the bastardization of Sengoku Basara. Our Japanese historic figures got renamed with generic names such as 'Frost', 'Venus', 'Scorpio', 'Red Minotaur' or 'Iron Ox', four playable characters were completely removed and they tweaked the gameplay...

 Well, this is a Dynasty Warriors clone through and through, but not without its own unique ideas. For instance, as you level up your character you can unlock moves you can bind to R1+Square and R1+Triangle. On the other hand, you only have your very basic Square attack string and a generic special move you can use with triangle. For this bastard version of Sengoku Basara, they made your triangle attack 'Prime' your enemies, making them more susceptible to damage... and the only way to get energy for your Super energy gauge from them. All in all, the fact that you only have one combo string makes the game even more repetitive than Dynasty Warriors, even though you get a few other special moves. The Prime mechanic is incredibly dumb because it turns every fight into pressing triangle then smashing square, and once the prime status wears off, inflicting it again. The fact that a single attack in your repertoire inflicts prime is just dumb.

 You get a total of six playable characters, at first, and you can unlock another six by finishing the Conquest Mode with each member of the starting roster. It's a decent roster considering how different every character feels from each other, even though in the end you'll be mashing that square button until the cows go home.

 What I'll give the game is that it feels really good. The framerate holds up well and smashing enemies to the ground feels quite satisfying. The fact that you can change your direction as you attack puts it leagues above the first DW games... only to lose that advantage as soon as you start facing off against bosses. Y'see there's no lock-on mechanic, and enemy generals love to jump and move all over the battlefield. It's impossible to keep track of them, which makes fighting them a chore. Fights that could take seconds now take up minutes because they keep running circles around you and there's nothing you can do about it,

 I kinda liked Devil Kings but I kinda disliked it too. I think a couple of runs through the Conquest Mode is fun enough, but as soon as you hit your third playthrough battling through the same stages... it wears a bit out. 

 6.0

Game #946: Avatar the Last Airbender - Into the Inferno

  Stop it, I haven't watched the show yet. Sue me.

 With Avatar - The Last Airbender: Into the Inferno under my belt I've already played every game based on the show, only missing the one based on the movie. Regardless, what a mediocre ride it's been. Avatar was one of Nickelodeon's big hits and these games were all that they could muster? What a disappointment.

 Into the Inferno shakes things up again, and this is the most ambitious game in the series yet, completely overhauling the game. Clearly built for the Wii, the right analog stick moves a pointer around the screen that you can use to bend elements. Aang can use every element, making him the only character that can get a use out of this with no elements in sight, since he can just shoot air. Katara, Toph and Zuko need sources of water, earth and fire respectively to be able to use this feature in combat. Sokka can use his boomerang, so he is also free from the elemental limitation. 

 This bending mechanic actually makes puzzles more fun than they've ever been, even though they are still super simple. The fact that you are playing around with elements and affecting the environment make it slightly more fun than you'd think. When it works, anyways. During the Wind Temple stage I used water to revitalize bushes and a tree.... and I spent like half an hour jumping around wondering what to do. I found a source of fire and I figured I must burn the tree, but it wouldn't catch on fire. So I looked it up online.... and I had to burn the tree. And it wouldn't work. I had to reset the game and skipped using water and then, finally, somehow, I burned the tree. Not fun.

 The game is still very linear and the game decides your two-man party on every stage, although this time around the CPU won't take over the other character, so you can just swap between them in case one gets hurt. It makes more sense in parties when Aang isn't present, since Aang can bend any element so you can solve every puzzle just using him.

 So the adventuring is slightly better.... but combat turned into a slogfest. Now combat is all about mashing square so that your character can cycle between his or her two attack animations until the enemy is weak and your character performs a finisher. It takes SO long to defeat enemies, and waves feel endless, and you deal so little damage. Sometimes the game lets you use bending to help, but it still takes TOO long. It's so boring. There's no block or dodge, which is incredibly poor design since enemies can just decide to block mid-way through your attacks and counter attack THROUGH your attacks. Eventually I figured that jumping and attacking as soon as they started blocking was the way to go, but it's dumb and you feel dumb. The bosses too, they are so boring, and in some cases it's hard to tell if you are actually dealing damage to them. Like the Azula and her lackey boss fight, I didn't know if I was doing something right or not, I just kept running with Sokka, spamming the boomerang until I stunned the lackey, hitting her, and then avoiding Azula's attack. And it took SO long to defeat them, and there was no hint or signal or anything to know that what I was doing was working.

 And the bugs.... besides the one I already mentioned, one time I got a soundless cutscene. Another time Toph got stuck next to the catapult. I couldn't move away, kill myself or reload a checkpoint. Right when I was about to give up, and I stopped pressing buttons, Toph un-stuck herself. Somehow. I don't know.

 Thus ends Avatar's run on the home consoles of its era, with a loud whimper. I can safely say that this was the most promising of the bunch, and the one that had the most interesting ideas when it came to bending, but I can also say that it's boring and unpolished. I'd stick with the first one, it was the most fun, and avoid the two sequels.

 4.0

Game #945: Beat Down - Fists of Vengeance

  Try Hard: Edge of XTREME revenge

 If a game ever tried way too hard, Beat Down: Fists of Vengeance would be it. This is a beat'em up/fighting game hybrid that does things its own way and winds up turning into one perplexing game lost in the shuffle of every other game that thinks being edgy means being cool.

 You play as any of five hitmen, each one more unlikeable than the other, as they try to make sense of their betrayal. But it's hard to get invested in the story because it's hard to care about these pricks. They are so bratty they don't even like each other. And then the game pits you into a black and brown world, with drug deals going on left and right, and you being able to brutally pummel your opponents to death via a 'beat down'. Characters end up bloody and bruised after a fight, because edge, and it seems like characters can't go two lines without cursing or insulting someone, because they are EDGY. So yeah, the plot if anything is so bad it's almost good, at least you might get a chuckle. 

 The easiest way to describe the game would be Yakuza but poorly done. All seven chapters take place in the same city, and you can move through the arguably small town at your leisure. Thing is.... there are tons of loading screens. The loading times aren't long per se, it's just that every area is very small, so getting from point A to point B might mean going through like 3-4 different loading screens. This makes exploration a bit annoying, because sitting through so many loading screens might kill your enthusiasm to explore. And that's a shame, because you can completely customize your characters, going through different clothing stores as well as visiting the hospital for surgery, to change your face. Heck, clothing is gender neutral, so if you want to be the toughest drag-queen in town... go ahead! But getting to the stores can be such a drag. Add to this the impenetrable sidequest system. Basically there are special characters you can fight and recruit to your side, and thus you can unlock sidequests, some that have their own content. But finding these can be a royal pain in the neck without a guide, because there are so few hints or markers or anything, coupled to the various loading screens that quickly get tiresome.

 Battles against common thugs or cops turn the game into a 3-D beat'em up, you have 360 degrees of movement, a punch, a kick, a block button and a grab. You can also equip up to two different items, could be healing consumables or weapons, on R2 and L2, or why not just pick up weapons laying around or dropped by your enemies? You can recruit NPCs and bring up to two allies with you, and they'll help in these brawls. You can pretty much challenge any NPC into one of these brawls, and why wouldn't you? Your character is a prick, it goes with his or her personality.

 That said, if you trigger a fight with a special character, namely characters with a name, the game turns into a fighting game. Controls and movement are exactly the same as in the brawler mode, but now the camera is focused on giving on putting both fighters on each side of the screen. That said, the camera may get stuck around stuff if you move too much, no bueno. The fighting itself is alright but a bit sloppy. Sometimes it's hard to determine when a character is under invincibility frames or not, and the combo system is a bit finicky, but it's not awful. These one on one fights can be potentially three on three fights, assuming you, your opponent or both have back up, and after one battler loses all its health the next one takes its place.

 Defeating special characters grants you experience points that you can use to increase your health, strength or learn new moves. You level up these at a pitifully slow rate, so be warned.

 The last thing worth mentioning is that the game offers a simple VS mode that you can play with another player or another CPU. Only a fraction of the characters involved in the story mode are available, but at least you get all the big names.

 In the end, Beat Down is a very forgettable game. There's nothing too offensive about it, except maybe how hard it tries to be edgy, and there's nothing particularly broken about it, but it failed to make an impression.

 5.0

Game #944: Skygunner

  Aim for the skies.... and shoot'em down.

 I've never been much of a fan of dogfighting games, I tried the Ace Combat series one time but it just wasn't for me. That said, a ton of years ago, there I was at the flea market, and this super colorful cover catches my eye, Skygunner it was titled, and while it wasn't my cup of tea... it sure was charming. And now here I am finally getting to write about it.

 The game lets you play as two different characters... at first, but you can unlock another three if you are good enough. Each character has a different difficulty setting and while all five stages are shared, different characters may get different objectives in them, sometimes. Besides difficulty settings, every character has their own unique action, for example Ciel can stop mid-air and unleash a barrage of heavy machinegun fire, setting them slightly apart, plus, while you have three sub-weapons with you at all times, characters may have different loadouts, for instance, Ciel and Femme have the same loadout, but Copain swaps one of their sub weapons for pumpkin bombs.

 Getting the hang of the controls may take a while, for instance, you are always locking onto something, so if you want to move elsewhere, and see where you are going, you'd best try to lock on to something that's on that way, by tapping triangle in order to switch between targetable enemies. Barrel rolls, your best evasive maneuver, is done by pressing L3 while moving or by pressing a direction on the digital pad and letting go after a short while. As I'm saying, it takes a little while, but you can get used to it.

 The game is kinda hard. Kinda. Just getting through the game is easy enough, but actually scoring high in order to get upgrades, which will help you in unlocking two of the three unlockables? Good luck. Firing at thin air deducts points, using too many sub weapons deducts points, plus, you are trying to shoot down enemies WHILE other allies do so as well, so they may rob you of points. Actually scoring high is the real challenge, and man oh man is it tough. I was only able to unlock Copain!

 That said, the game is SO cute, and it's arcadey nature makes it pretty darn fun. A single playthrough lasts about hour and a half, which is more than fair considering you get up to five different playable characters. So, while it ain't my cup of tea, I'll always call a spade a spade as well as a good game a good game.

 7.5

Game #943: Avatar - The Last Airbender The Burning Earth(Playstation2)

  This cover never goes out of style.

 This is the third version of Avatar: The Last Airbender - The Burning Earth I'm playing and... man, the cover is just SO good. Wish the game was as good as the cover!

 Like the ports before it, this game covers the second season of the show. How good a job it does is beyond me, but I could follow t    he story, albeit you can tell there are some things missing. Like when Katara tells Zuko that she thought he had changed.... in the very first scene they share together. The game lasts about 5 hours, which is as much as a game like this deserves. Oh, and while I found the first game's graphics super endearing, this one removed the cell shading... and the lip flapping. No, really, most cutscenes, the ones done in-engine, have voice acting... but no mouth movement. The previous game had very expressive facial animations, but those are entirely gone, and with the cell shading gone too.... this game looks lifeless.

 Once again, the game offers a lot of playable characters, in this case, Aang, Sokka and Katara return, but they are joined by Zuko, Iroh, Jet, Toph and... Momo, the lemur! I like the increased cast, and while they play exactly the same, everyone gets different animations, and I guess everyone's projectile is different, heck, Jet's a kick. On the other hand, since there are more characters, now the game decides with which two-man group you'll be playing at any one time, and while Zuko gets some fantastic animations he is only playable once, what a waste. You can play the entire game in co-op, and the game offers a very basic bonus VS mode for two players in which you can use any of the eight characters, and I'd never say no to freebies like this, as basic as it is.

 The game removed most rpg elements from the first game, rendering this one a very basic brawler. To be fair, there are a few puzzles here and there, but nothing too hard. That said, there's a sort of experience gauge, and breaking things and defeating enemies may drop XP, every level up lets you allot a new point into Combo, which adds new combos, Ranged, which strengthens your ranged attack and Super, which strengthens your super move. Up to three levels per specialty, and you'll have it maxed long before the game ends. Health can be upgraded by finding barely hidden tokens inside gold chests.

 Stages themselves are pretty easy up to the last stage, when suddenly enemies can go through your health bar like butter. The CPU does an almost acceptable job at helping you, so there's that. Bosses were the hardest part about the game because they can easily go through your attacks and have very few true vulnerable moments. That said, there's nothing stopping you from spamming your projectiles. Aside from that, for whatever reason they introduced QTEs into boss fights. And I hate QTEs.

 Graphics aren't the only area in which production values went down, for you see, the game is super buggy. The first time I started the game the cutscene had no audio whatsoever, but once I restarted the game I could finally hear the characters speak. Another time an enemy model got stuck in the middle of my way because why not, but he couldn't be harmed nor did he move. And what about the time I went to a boss after one of Appa's flying stages and Aang was completely invisible? Another time a character started endlessly respawning over a bottomless pit.

 All in all, this is a tolerable beat'em up, but there's much better on the system. That aside, fans might enjoy this one.

5.0