Review #380: Vexx

 Halfway fun, halfway vexing.

 If you grew up gaming in the 90s, you ought to be familiar with collectathons. Happy-go-lucky games featuring anthropomorphic animals on their quest to collect dozens of magic mcguffins and the such. Enter Vexx, an attempt to fuse Mario 64 with edginess and hardcoreness and darkness and the such.... and it kinda worked.

 Meet Vexx, apparently the last of his kind, after Yabu enslaved his people, and murdered them and his grandfather, which made this adventure personal. Coming across the Talons, mystical weapons that he can't take off, Vexx ventures into 9 different worlds, in order to collect 81 beating hearts and open up the way to Yabu and avenge his grandfather. The game has a rather conflicting artsyle, since enemies and Vexx himself are rather... cutesy, but the world tries to be dark and bleak, dealing with murder and a female... thing with protruding nipples being kinda there as the narrator... it's like they didn't commit fully to either cuteness or edginess and the end result is a rather unmemorable world and characters.

 Sadly, this seeps into the aesthetics of the levels themselves. Platformers of yore had very memorable level designs, not so is the case with Vexx. Each of the 9 worlds have very few landmarks that stand out or personality, which can be rather disappointing. Every world also has a different amount of hearts hidden inside of it, but there's a short poem as well as guiding arrows helping you discover how to get to them. The game starts off mindnumbingly easy, but the latter stages are just evil, and I'd argue that the last level is very poorly designed as well. Also, a few hearts might be a bit too hard to find. One of the Hearts from level 2 must be obtained in level 1, and nothing hints to that, and later on, you must find the right order to press a few switches around a fountain... with no hints as to what is the order, and pushing the wrong switch results in you losing health! Luckily, you only need 60 hearts out of 81 in order to beat the game, and there's no bonus for 100% to care about.

 That said, if something works well, it's the controls. Vexx moves sorta like Mario or Banjo, he can jump, long jump(By crouching and running) or high jump(By crouching), and it all works rather well! Movement is pretty smooth once you get the hang of it, and it won't be too soon before you'll be using acrobatics in style to even skip certain portions of stages! There's also a needless depth to combat, Vex can perform different combos depending on your timing with the square button, as well as juggle enemies with jump kicks, but it amounts to nothing really, enemies can soak up so many hits that I just started avoiding them altogether. Vexx can also gain access to 2 power ups, the Molten Armor and the Wing Suit, they are in a very few amount of levels, and they only exist in order to gather a few hearts, and if you thought flying with Mario was hard, you ain't seen nothing yet, flying with Vexx is stilted, wonky and unsatisfying.

 There were a a few issues that really hurt the game, like the poor camera that loves getting stuck on objects, it will get in your way at one time or the other. Some levels also feature a few too many loading screens, which can make Hearts like the 'collect 100 shards' objectives a real chore. There's also the archaic Mario 64 mechanic of sending you back into the Hub after every heart you collect, which gets annoying really fast. The last boss... is something else, even after you figure out waits to exploit his AI, it's still hard! Uppercut-to-ground-pound-to-flip-kick his swarm of minions on the first phase, and then you need to figure out that it's better to long jump rather than high jump out of the way.... it's quite the ordeal.

 Vexx tried. The devs' heart was in the right place, and they nailed most of the controls just fine. It's a shame that they couldn't fully commit to this 'we are dark and edgy!' direction, and how forgettable the worlds are. Vexx is fun when it's fun, but when it hits its lows... it can get rather vexing.
 6.0 out of 10

Now Playing: Vexx

 It's a me, hardcore edgelord Mario!

 Do you remember Vexx? I do. It was hyped as 'Mario for adult players', and me, as an edgy forum-frequenter mememaster teen bought into it. And when I finally came across it... it was OK. Still, A nagging feeling of 'I need to complete it' got into my head last year, and here we are.

 First of all... I'm not impressed. It feels like Mario 64, if a bit more clunky. I was excited at first, 'I'm gonna complete it!' and then... I was warped back into the Hub, losing all my progress in the level... yeah, that's way too antiquated and boring for me. I think I'll just do the bare minimum.

 Anyways, I'm not impressed, and while I wasn't expecting much, the issue above kinda soured me about Vexx, so I'm kinda not looking forwards to finishing it. But hey, at least Tony Hawk - American Wasteland is coming up next!

Review #379: Transformers - Devastation

 A beautiful oiled machine or nothing but scrap metal?

 Remember Platinum Games? They make some pretty dope games, focusing on action, creativity in combos and style. However, in order to produce their bigger projects, they also have to dabble into more simple, lower budget games. Not unlike Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or Legend of Korra, Transformers Devastation follows Platinum's 'Generic Action Game' blueprint to a tee, it's fun, it works... but it leaves something to be desired.

 Basically, Megatron is up to no good, so it's up to Optimus Prime, Gridlock, Bumblebee, Wheeljack and Sideswap to stop him and his cohorts. The first thing that might disappoint players is that Decepticons are unplayble, and while you could argue that they wouldn't fit with the plot, seeing how all five Autobots are pretty much glorified skinswaps, it lays a bit flimsy as an excuse. The game consists of seven chapters that seem to get shorter and shorter as you advance through the game, lasting up to... 4-5 hours at most, but at least stages have optional side missions as well as about 50 challenge missions if you are so inclined.

 If you've ever played an action game by Platinum Games, you'll feel right at home. with both Weak and Strong attacks that can be chained in four-hit combos as well as a dodge button that, if timed correctly, will slow down time, letting you get in some hits on your opponent. There're two gauges below your health bar, one fills slowly over time and lets you use your unique Special Attack, one of the few things that set apart each Autobot, while the other fills as you deal damage, and is used to engage your super attack, which once again, is unique to each character.

 As you low through enemies and explore stages you'll come across loot, not that far unlike Diablo. Each Autobot can equip up to four weapons, most characters can equip most weapons, but there are a very few weapon only usable by some. Regardless, besides the two unique moves mentioned above as well as the stats, every character uses every weapon in the exact same way. Grimlock is a bit more fun than the rest, since his Vehicle mode, a T-Rex, actually gets its own unique moveset, soemthing the Vehicle Modes can't claim. Excess weapons can be used to power up your favorite weapons, as well as putting their unique buffs on them.

 Combat is fast and furious, landing hits in feels very good, and it runs very smoothly. You can also link vehicle attacks after your four hit combos, and these look badass. But, for as fun as melee combat can be, it will eventually grow a bit boring, since there isn't much room for creativity. It doesn't help that the game only has 3 different 'Stages', the Town, which makes up four chapters, and two underground bases. It quickly grows old. And as fun as combat is, it lacks a bit of finesse, there's no hard lock-on, instead, your character will soft lock into the nearest enemy, which can be a bit annoying when you are trying to attack a certain enemy, but the game will lock you on to another enemy, closer to you, but hidden behind the camera or something.

 Transformers - Devastation is a good game, but it's also lacking. It's fun to smash enemies to bits... but it's also repetitive and simplistic to a fault, with little room for creativity on the player's part. The game looks gorgeous... but there're so few environments and enemy types, with most bosses been reused at least once. There're many different weapon types... but the all more or less behave the same, and making all five characters almost indistinct from one another was a missed opportunity, not to mention the lack of playable Decepticons! Whether you're a fan of the franchise or not, there's fun to be had with Transformers, but don't expect another one of Platinum Game's greatest.

 7.0 out of 10

Now Playing: Transformers - Devastation

 Platinum struck gold again.

 Undeterred by my savefile loss, I returned to the PS3 to face Megatron in Transformers Devastation. I'll keep it short and sweet: It's fantastic.

 The Good:
- Combat is fast and furious, it feels so good to land attacks.
- The graphics look phenomenal, it's very colorful, runs at a steady framerate and the animations are top notch.
- Simple mechanics, easy to pick up and play, even the nitty gritty like synthesizing weapons is pretty easy

 The Bad:
 - No playable Decepticons.
 - All five characters are basically clones. It seems like a few weapons are restricted to a certain characters? But I've yet to come across one, I'm just going by the HUD at the LAB.


 And that's about it, I think it's pretty damn good. It might even be better than their Ninja Turtles game.

Review #378: The Hobbit

 More than just a silly cash in.

 Back when Peter Jackson was making mad cash with his Lord of the Rings trilogy, a curious little thing happened... somehow, two companies made out with the rights to The Lord of the Rings, EA had the rights for movie adaptations while Sierra had the rights for Book adaptations. So of course they had to churn out crappy little cash-ins, like that terrible PS2 game. Or that RPG on the GBA that would freeze after a certain battle. Or that fun, if generic, RTS for the PC.... and then there was The Hobbit.

 Based on the book by the same name, The Hobbit puts you in the role of reluctant hero Bilbo Baggins as Gandalf the Grey sort-of forces him into accompanying a group of dwarves on a quest to get back their gold... this quest will take Bilbo through forests, elven towns, human towns, mountains an even face to face with a mighty dragon. Changes in order to make it more 'gamey' not withstanding, it's a decent adaptation of the book. Graphics are colorful, if a bit lacking in detail, music is fine and the voice acting is fine.

 The Hobbit is a linear adventure game. You go from stage to stage solving puzzles, battling enemies and platforming your way through bottomless pits. Most stages have a fair amount of sidequests to complete, as well as a ton of hidden collectibles to find. Collectibles that matter come in three forms: Courage Points, which will increase your HP, money, which can be used to buy items and upgrades after each stage as well as scrolls to enhance your combat capabilities. Sometimes, goodies will be locked inside chests that must be lock-picked in order to pillage them, lock-picking consists of a series of simple minigames that don't really overstay their welcome, and can be bypassed by finding or purchasing skeleton keys.

 Combat and platforming are... serviceable. They are not horrible, but they are not great either, they work just well enough to be considered acceptable. Bilbo relies on three means of offense: His staff, his blade, Sting, as well as throwing stones. The staff works great to defeat fast moving enemies, since the swings cover a wide area, but deal little damage. The sword is your main goblin slayer, able to break shells and deal more damage than the staff, while rocks can be used to slay enemies from afar. For this type of game, the combat showed a curious semblance of depth, since there're reasons to swap weapons depending on your foes, but you'd do just fine sticking to a single weapon as well. Sometimes collision detection might feel a bit wonky, but it's passable.

 Platforming can be a bit challenging since there're a lot of botomless pits and sometimes it's not very clear if you'll make a jump... or even if you were supposed to land a few jumps! At least Bilbo will let you know if you can jump from a rope to another rope, if he extends his arm forward, he can make it. Each level is VERY long, but the game is very generous with multiple save spots... and you'd do well to use them, since death means starting back at your last save. Trust me, you don't want to lose hours of progress due to a poorly planned jump!

 Lastly, there're a few shoe-horned stealth sections, but save that one level, these sections are fairly short and fairly easy, plus, as soon as you get The One Ring you can go invisible for a while and it turns stealth sequences into cake walks.

 One of the game's biggest flaws are the loading times, they're excessively long, but, at least, most levels only need to load once, and continuing after death is seamless... That said, a few of the larger levels will have a few loading screens peppered through, but these are much, much shorter than the initial one. It also has to be said, Bilbo moves rather slowly... running around is very slow, and at times exasperating enough as to warrant trying to bunny-hop your way to your destination! Climbing ladders can also be a bit annoying, since Bilbo is so slow!

 Surprisingly, The Hobbit is a rather good game, limited only by the low budget. Exploring levels is fun, the platforming can be fun as unpolished as it is, and combat needed a lot of tightening in order to make it rewarding, but as a whole, the game works fine. It's no masterpiece, nor a 'hidden gem', but it's definitely worth a look.
 6.5 out of 10

My SaveFile died and Why I hate Modern Gaming

 So there I was, fresh off the Hobbit, ready to start a new game: Transformers - Devastation. So, I turn on my PS3, seems like something went wrong the last time it turned off, so it had to check for errors. So it did... but it got stuck at 49% for 10+ minutes, so I rebooted the system...

...and was forced to wipe off all my data and format the disc.
 There went all the costumes I spent hours getting in JoJo's All Star Battle Royale. I had a lot of games, like Tales of Graces and Xillia, or Devil May Cry, waiting for me to start new files with all the goodies. But alas, it was not meant to be.

  I also have to download all my DLC again, which isn't much fun. But then again, unlocking characters in ArkSys games is gonna be a chore. Unlocking everything in Saint Seiya Soldiers Souls is gonna be a drag, Raging Blast 2 was boring as well.

 My 100+ hours invested in Dynasty Warriors: Gundam 3? Gone.
 I was planning on giving Escape Dead Island another go with its DLC, the one that needs you beating it once in order to access? Those plans went down the drain. Fun. Warriors Orochi 3 was really fun, but unlocking every character? That wasn't fun. Unlocking as much as I did in Xenoverse was a grueling chore, and I'm not doing that again.

 Man, I miss memory cards. At least if my Wii dies, everything's in my SD card.

Now Playing: The Hobbit

 Ain't no cow milked enough like The Lord of the Rings.

 Nostalgia is a powerful coat of paint. It makes you remember things as being better, shinier and more beautiful than they really were. Case in point, Sierra's The Hobbit, a game I had rather fond memories of... but turns out to be rather mediocre. Kinda.

 My first impressions were not good. Bilbo moved like a sack of potatoes, invisible walls everywhere, and rather stiff movement.... But it was an interesting first level, not unlike Twilight Princess: An introduction with no combat, but instead a ton of mundane tasks that sets the mood for the beginning of the adventure. By the end of the first level, I was kinda impressed!

 Basically, it's not as fantastic as I remembered it to be, but it has an undeniable charm