Now Playing: Transformers - Devastation

 Platinum struck gold again.

 Undeterred by my savefile loss, I returned to the PS3 to face Megatron in Transformers Devastation. I'll keep it short and sweet: It's fantastic.

 The Good:
- Combat is fast and furious, it feels so good to land attacks.
- The graphics look phenomenal, it's very colorful, runs at a steady framerate and the animations are top notch.
- Simple mechanics, easy to pick up and play, even the nitty gritty like synthesizing weapons is pretty easy

 The Bad:
 - No playable Decepticons.
 - All five characters are basically clones. It seems like a few weapons are restricted to a certain characters? But I've yet to come across one, I'm just going by the HUD at the LAB.


 And that's about it, I think it's pretty damn good. It might even be better than their Ninja Turtles game.

Review #378: The Hobbit

 More than just a silly cash in.

 Back when Peter Jackson was making mad cash with his Lord of the Rings trilogy, a curious little thing happened... somehow, two companies made out with the rights to The Lord of the Rings, EA had the rights for movie adaptations while Sierra had the rights for Book adaptations. So of course they had to churn out crappy little cash-ins, like that terrible PS2 game. Or that RPG on the GBA that would freeze after a certain battle. Or that fun, if generic, RTS for the PC.... and then there was The Hobbit.

 Based on the book by the same name, The Hobbit puts you in the role of reluctant hero Bilbo Baggins as Gandalf the Grey sort-of forces him into accompanying a group of dwarves on a quest to get back their gold... this quest will take Bilbo through forests, elven towns, human towns, mountains an even face to face with a mighty dragon. Changes in order to make it more 'gamey' not withstanding, it's a decent adaptation of the book. Graphics are colorful, if a bit lacking in detail, music is fine and the voice acting is fine.

 The Hobbit is a linear adventure game. You go from stage to stage solving puzzles, battling enemies and platforming your way through bottomless pits. Most stages have a fair amount of sidequests to complete, as well as a ton of hidden collectibles to find. Collectibles that matter come in three forms: Courage Points, which will increase your HP, money, which can be used to buy items and upgrades after each stage as well as scrolls to enhance your combat capabilities. Sometimes, goodies will be locked inside chests that must be lock-picked in order to pillage them, lock-picking consists of a series of simple minigames that don't really overstay their welcome, and can be bypassed by finding or purchasing skeleton keys.

 Combat and platforming are... serviceable. They are not horrible, but they are not great either, they work just well enough to be considered acceptable. Bilbo relies on three means of offense: His staff, his blade, Sting, as well as throwing stones. The staff works great to defeat fast moving enemies, since the swings cover a wide area, but deal little damage. The sword is your main goblin slayer, able to break shells and deal more damage than the staff, while rocks can be used to slay enemies from afar. For this type of game, the combat showed a curious semblance of depth, since there're reasons to swap weapons depending on your foes, but you'd do just fine sticking to a single weapon as well. Sometimes collision detection might feel a bit wonky, but it's passable.

 Platforming can be a bit challenging since there're a lot of botomless pits and sometimes it's not very clear if you'll make a jump... or even if you were supposed to land a few jumps! At least Bilbo will let you know if you can jump from a rope to another rope, if he extends his arm forward, he can make it. Each level is VERY long, but the game is very generous with multiple save spots... and you'd do well to use them, since death means starting back at your last save. Trust me, you don't want to lose hours of progress due to a poorly planned jump!

 Lastly, there're a few shoe-horned stealth sections, but save that one level, these sections are fairly short and fairly easy, plus, as soon as you get The One Ring you can go invisible for a while and it turns stealth sequences into cake walks.

 One of the game's biggest flaws are the loading times, they're excessively long, but, at least, most levels only need to load once, and continuing after death is seamless... That said, a few of the larger levels will have a few loading screens peppered through, but these are much, much shorter than the initial one. It also has to be said, Bilbo moves rather slowly... running around is very slow, and at times exasperating enough as to warrant trying to bunny-hop your way to your destination! Climbing ladders can also be a bit annoying, since Bilbo is so slow!

 Surprisingly, The Hobbit is a rather good game, limited only by the low budget. Exploring levels is fun, the platforming can be fun as unpolished as it is, and combat needed a lot of tightening in order to make it rewarding, but as a whole, the game works fine. It's no masterpiece, nor a 'hidden gem', but it's definitely worth a look.
 6.5 out of 10

My SaveFile died and Why I hate Modern Gaming

 So there I was, fresh off the Hobbit, ready to start a new game: Transformers - Devastation. So, I turn on my PS3, seems like something went wrong the last time it turned off, so it had to check for errors. So it did... but it got stuck at 49% for 10+ minutes, so I rebooted the system...

...and was forced to wipe off all my data and format the disc.
 There went all the costumes I spent hours getting in JoJo's All Star Battle Royale. I had a lot of games, like Tales of Graces and Xillia, or Devil May Cry, waiting for me to start new files with all the goodies. But alas, it was not meant to be.

  I also have to download all my DLC again, which isn't much fun. But then again, unlocking characters in ArkSys games is gonna be a chore. Unlocking everything in Saint Seiya Soldiers Souls is gonna be a drag, Raging Blast 2 was boring as well.

 My 100+ hours invested in Dynasty Warriors: Gundam 3? Gone.
 I was planning on giving Escape Dead Island another go with its DLC, the one that needs you beating it once in order to access? Those plans went down the drain. Fun. Warriors Orochi 3 was really fun, but unlocking every character? That wasn't fun. Unlocking as much as I did in Xenoverse was a grueling chore, and I'm not doing that again.

 Man, I miss memory cards. At least if my Wii dies, everything's in my SD card.

Now Playing: The Hobbit

 Ain't no cow milked enough like The Lord of the Rings.

 Nostalgia is a powerful coat of paint. It makes you remember things as being better, shinier and more beautiful than they really were. Case in point, Sierra's The Hobbit, a game I had rather fond memories of... but turns out to be rather mediocre. Kinda.

 My first impressions were not good. Bilbo moved like a sack of potatoes, invisible walls everywhere, and rather stiff movement.... But it was an interesting first level, not unlike Twilight Princess: An introduction with no combat, but instead a ton of mundane tasks that sets the mood for the beginning of the adventure. By the end of the first level, I was kinda impressed!

 Basically, it's not as fantastic as I remembered it to be, but it has an undeniable charm

Review #377: Tony Hawk's Underground 2

 Stands tall as the peak of Tony Hawk's games.

 Now this, this what I think about anytime someone brings up Tony Hawk. Fast, simple gameplay, ridiculous goals and a very immature sense of humor. Realism is thrown out the window, this game embraces what's made the Tony Hawk games so good before and delivers what I consider to be the finest in the series.

 There're two main modes to choose from: Story Mode and Classic Mode. Story Mode centers in a contest around the world between Bam Margera and Tony Hawk, with your own custom skater caught in the middle. It's a hilarious, ridiculous, if short, adventure that has you seeking secret skaters and secret vehicles while trashing everything around you. You'll spend time raising the dead, throwing shrimp at lifesavers as well as playing chicken with a stampeding bull. To cal it over the top is an understatement. But hey, maybe, just maybe, you don't enjoy Tony Hawk post THPS3, and that's fine, THUG2's got you covered with Classic Mode, featuring repurposed levels from the Story Mode as well as 7 new levels(Remakes from levels from THPS 1 to 3) as well as the 2-minute, multiple objective structure.

 Story Mode is a blast, you'll never be doing the same thing for too long, and every level lets you skate with four different characters: Your custom skater, a pro, a guest and a vehicle-character. Vehicle Characters come with their own set of wheels, from karts to rocket-propelled wheelchairs, and they control well enough, save maybe Steve-O and his bull. The character creator is fairly robust, so you'll be able to create something to your liking. I found it brilliant how you develop your stats in story mode: By accomplishing feats, like grinding for X amount of seconds, landing X amount of grabs in a single combo, etc. This lets you raise your stats at your own leisure. You could pretty much max your stats on the first level, or you can ignore it and develop it as you accomplish goals. In Classic Mode, however, it's back to finding stat points hidden throughout the levels.

 But what really makes Tony Hawk's Underground 2 my favorite game in the franchise are its levels. There's so much variety, and every level stands out from each other... well, at least as far as Underground 2's exclusive levels go, but hey, the retro-levels selection is pretty good as well. These new original levels feature all sorts of landmarks that make them so memorable and fun to just fool around in. It helps that there's a ton of secret skaters to unlock by completing both classic and story modes in different difficulty settings.

 But maybe you are the creative type? That's just as fine, create-a-park returns as well as create-a-trick, and now you can even create your own goals, with a few types that didn't even make it into the story mode. Basically, if you like to create? The game's got you covered. You like Multiplayer? You're accounted for as well, featuring the classic suspects like HORSE, or even 2-Player free skating. You like Classic Tony Hawk? It's got you covered as well. You like Modern Tony Hawk? Enjoy. There's something for everyone in here.

 I don't know what else to say, I love Underground 2. If I was to complain about it, it'd be about the short length of the Story Mode, since it's what I enjoyed the most. Regardless, if you like Tony Hawk's games, Underground 2 is a no brainer.
 9.0 out of 10

Now Playing: Tony Hawk's Underground 2

 Now this, THIS is MY Tony Hawk.

 Now, I've played my fair share of Tony Hawk games(3, 4, Underground 2, Project 8 and Proving Ground) but this one is easily my favorite. While my knowledge about 1 and 2 is pretty limited to a few vids and 2's demo disc, I'm pretty sure that Neversoft hit their stride, when it came to developing levels, with 4. But Underground 2's levels are just so goddamn good, it houses most of my favorite levels in the entire franchise.

 But I'm getting ahead of myself, there's so much more that makes Underground 2 oh so good. I could mention how this was, at its time, the most advanced, in depth and varied entry yet, but that hold true for every single entry, since each game just fine tuned what worked and piled up even more mechanics. So I might as well mention the fantastic structure that lets the player fulfill goals at their leisure, and man, are these goals fun! They are varied, ridiculous and marred in that immature punk-skater sense of humor, probably some of the best goals in the series yet. But maybe, maybe you don't like Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 4's goal system, that's just as fine, since Underground 2 also has a Classic Mode, with a few unique levels to itself! There's absolutely no going wrong with THUG2, whether you like classic Tony Hawk or... erm, post-3 Tony Hawk.

 There's a lot more I could mention as to why I love the game, but I'm saving it for the review, needless to say, this game is the perfect example of how Tony Hawk fell when it jumped into the PS3/X360 era. They tried too hard to be more realistic, sacrificing the franchise's  sense of humor. This also seeped into the missions, which became more grounded in reality, more boring and more repetitive. And realistic isn't necessarily bad per se, but when one of your biggest strengths is your over the top ridiculousness... letting go of it was a bad move. Another issue was how lame the new mechanics were, like Nail the Trick, Nail the Grab and Nail the Manual, but they were probably grasping at straws since the games were already loaded with so many mechanics

 But what really killed the games for me... were the new level designs. While, as I mentioned, I feel like Tony Hawk's games' levels hit their sweetspot with 4, even the previous games followed the same school of thought: Theming. Each level had its own theme, which made it fun to skate through. Project 8 and Proving Ground went with realism, and in doing so, skate parks lost their personality and became dull, lifeless and boring... everything a Tony Hawk game isn't.

Review #376: Suikoden 3

 It only took about 60 hours, but the war is over...

 Konami's third installment of their war-focused JRPG series, Suikoden, was also the series' first jump into the PS2 and the world of 3D. Featuring three different heroes, for three different point of views, it was a safe, but successful entrance into the then-next-gen gaming.

 Suikoden 3 starts off marred in political strife between three bands: Zexen, Grasslands and Harmonia, encompassing all the different tribes and civilizations that make up each kingdom. You could say that Suikoden's world is pretty grim, and you'd be right. You're given three different lead characters: Captain Geddoe, Zexen's elite knight Chris and Grassland's Karaya tribe's leader's son, Hugo. Each character has 3 chapter all to themselves, before all narratives fuse together for chapter 4 and 5. Although you are allowed to make a choice after clearing all 9 chapters which will affect on whom the story will focus, and it will lead to a few minor differences on the latter two chapters. The story was alright, it had a few interesting peaks as well as a few dull moments, and sadly, as interesting as some of the character interactions were, they weren't very memorable as a whole.

 Suikoden's main draw is letting the player collect 108 characters for their Headquarters. While not all of them can partake in battles, they will aid you in some way. Be it offereing passive abilities, like healing your characters after each battle, to commodities, like having your own personal shop and blacksmith at your HQ, as well as a few minigames. Gathering every character is a fun enterprise, and it's always fun coming upon the next unique character model to add to your garrison. Two of these, Thomas and Koroku, get a few side-chapters all to themselves. Koroku the dog's is more of a silly diversion, while Thomas has two very grind-heavy chapters that offer a light-hearted look at their happenings while the main cast is dealing with war, corruption and strife. These two chapters can be rather boring, since couple with grinding comes a few points in which you'll be at a loss at what the game expects you to do. When in doubt, go to sleep in Thomas' bed. Also, try not to recruit everyone with the same lead character during the initial 9 chapters, as you could make things unnecessarily hard for the remaining characters!

 There're three different gameplay mechanics in Suikoden. Most of the time it plays like your standard-fare turn-based combat JRPG, you move from town to dungeon to town while happening upon random encounters. You're allowed to take up to six characters with you, as well as a seventh support character, and you issue commands to pairs rather than each individual character. It works well, it's fun. Then there're also 1-on-1 duels which work as silly rock-paper-scissor matches. Can't say I was a fan of those, but at least they aren't too bad. Lastly, there're strategic battles. These are stressful and annoying. The former due to the fact that characters killed in these may die forever, locking you out of the bonus epilogue and the latter since, while you get to move each 4-man throughout the board, battles are fought automatically, so it's up to the AI not to screw up. And they will screw up because they are dumb. Why not let the player issue commands is beyond me.

 Back onto the good stuff: Customization. You can customize every playable character by having them learn skills, and thus tailor them to your playstyle. Characters can also be equipped with up to three different Runes, which translate into magic and/or skills. It all amounts to a rather large degree of control over how your characters will play. And you'd best spend quality time with a bunch of these, as they will have to partake in Strategic Battles, and you don't want them dying, do you? Not only that, Hugo, Geddoe and Chris will split up every now and then during chapter 4 and 5, and they will have to fight their own tough bosses, so they will need their own party members... basically, grinding in this game will be unavoidable.

 I still have a couple of gripes left for me to unload. The smallest one surrounding some characters, y'see, some characters will join your party near the end of Chapter 5 which means that you won't get to use them much. It feels like kind of a waste. Secondly, it's not 'til chapter 4 that you unlock the means to fast travel, and until that happens you'll have to go through every dungeon and town on foot. It's pretty time consuming. Which is why I clocked over 60 hours yet the game felt rather short as a whole! To add insult to injury, when you recruit Vikki you're not told that you gained the ability to use her teleportation if you talk to her back on your HQ. And that means that you'll have to walk all the way back to your HQ anyways!... unless you recruit an optional character that grants you an item with the ability to warp back to HQ. The game should've done a better job explaining this, I did not find out about it 'til Chapter 5 when I was doing the rounds inside HQ.

 Flawed? Definitely. But the political angle and focus on war gives it a rather unique taste among JRPGs. Plus, collecting all 108 characters is rather fun, even if most of them only require you talking to them in order to recruit them. You'll get the most mileage out of it provided you're willing to invest all the time it demands of you. I dunno, it kept me busy the entire month and the fatigue didn't set in 'til the last stretch.
 8.0 out of 10

Progress Report 2017 #1

  Because I don't want the blog to die and I want to write... Progress Reports are back!

 Suikoden 3: My main course at the moment, I'm kinda diggin' the game. I'm gonna finish Geddoe's chapters first, since he doesn't need to recruit anyone, then do Thomas, since he's the one that apparently needs the most recruits, then finish Chris and theeen do Hugo, because he's the character that stroke my fancy the most!

 Shin Megami Tensei IV: I defeated Peliades and crossed to the other part o' town. I love the Shin Megami Tensei games, but IV isn't all that fun. It doesn't help that the presentation is so underwhelming, they could've done better, but they didn't. Heck, even the 2D sprites are a bit lackluster, Medusa looked kinda funky. Anyways, I grew a bit bored of the game, so I decided to take a break with Suikoden 3.

 Corpse Party - Blood Drive: It's terrible, it is. I so want to review this piece of shovelware, but I'd rather finish it first... I'll try to finish it this year, but it's so... boring.

 Resident Evil 6: I plan on picking it up later down 2017, but not anytime soon

 Lord of Arcana: I don't know why I keep this game in my 'Now Playing' list. It's terrible, horrible, yet... I feel kinda dirty not finishing it and shelving it... but the game is not worth my time, anyone's time, so... I dunno.

 Mass Effect 1: Alright, I'm gonna give it another chance.... not anytime soon, but during 2017 for sure.

 Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate: Gotta come back to it! Maybe, maybe after finishing SMT IV.

 Dragon's Dogma - Dark Arisen: Maybe after Mass Effect 1-3. Or after one of 'em if I need a break.

Now playing: Suikoden 3

 It's been a while!

 So I just started Suikoden 3. Why 3? Because it's the one I played... even if only a few minutes. If I manage, I might even play the second one this year... Assuming I can pony up the dough!

 I decided to start with Chris, because why not, and it turns out that she's kinda... evil, and so are her allies! Just saw her raze an entire village because, apparently, that was their only way out of a war. The game seems interesting, although I'm not much of a fan of the automatic 'Strategic Battles'. The Skill Points, to customize your skills, is a more interesting idea though!

 It seems fun, I've high hopes for Suikoden 3.

Month Overview: February 2017

 Tally:
Painkiller - Hell & Damnation 6.0
Tony Hawk's - Proving Ground 6.0
Moon Diver                 2.5
Dillon's Rolling Western           4.0
Donkey Kong Country Returns 3D 8.0

 Sigh, definitely not an exciting month, filled with mediocrity and a few stinkers.

 Game of February 2017:

 The only standout this month was Donkey Kong Country Returns 3D. It should have fixed the game's imprecise controls from the Wii version, since now we have buttons, but somehow, it has its own unique control issues. That aside, this is the same game I loved on the Wii, and it's an ideal game to get on the 3DS IF you haven't played the original.

 Runner-up:

 Painkiller Hell and Damnation gets the edge because it's based on the original Painkiller, it has some of its best levels. It's a shame that this game is more or less a scam, but it's the only way to play PK on the PS3, so I'll take what I can get.

Review #375: Donkey Kong Country Returns 3D

 The Kong returns... now in 3D!

 A few years ago I played and reviewed Donkey Kong Country Returns on the Nintendo Wii, and you could say that I liked it quite a bit. Turns out it had a 3DS port, and seeing how my biggest pet peeve with the initial release were the motion controls, if this game traded them with proper button inputs... it was bound to be brilliant. But alas, it was not meant to be, not exactly.

 Firstly, a brief description of what the game is for the uninitiated: This is a 2.5D platform game styled after the Donkey Kong games of old(Or rather, the SNES era). You jump, and roll-attack your way through the game, but can also come across a barrel holding Diddy Kong, which works as a few extra hits as well as letting you hover for a while with his jetpack. The game is quite challenging, specially if you factor all the collectibles per level. It's pretty good. A lot of care and love went into bringing Donkey Kong back into modern standards, level design is fantastic and almost every level has its own gimmicks, only to be revisited if to offer a new twist on it.

 So, what's new with this version? There's a 'New Mode' which translates as Easy Mode, Donkey Kong can tank three hits instead of three, and Diddy doubles it up to six hits instead of four. There're more and better power ups for you to buy at Cranky's store as well. It will probably let newer players ease themselves into the game, since later in the game, most deaths will come from bottomless pits or 1-hit-kill obstacles, so it's not an absolute cakewalk. The 3D effect works beautifully with this game, one of the very few games I'd actually recommend playing in 3D.

 And then, what matters most, the new control scheme...s. It would've been too smart to let the player pick and choose what buttons does what, but instead, you've got to choose: Either use the analog stick and X/Y to attack and R/L to grab stuff or use the digital pad and L/R to attack and X/Y to grab.... What? I don't get it, you should've been able to indistinctively use either Digital or Analog pad at a whim, y'see, the analog stick is too imprecise for a platformer on a 2D plane, but I also wanted to use X/Y to attack... What a baffling design choice! Attacking felt unresponsive as well, I think that it's because the attack button also works as the ground-slam, so unless you press the button while moving, you won't attack. I dunno, but on more than one occasion I meant to attack but nothing came out, not even the slam. And I know for a fact that it wasn't my buttons' fault, since they work fine with other games. It might also be because the game now runs at 30FPs instead of 60...

 The game also promises a new world with 8 new levels... but you have to collect every KONG letter in every single stage. No thank you. I already played the Wii version, so... no thanks, I'll pass on that, I've more important stuff than forcing myself to replay levels in order to find all the letters. This was a bad, bad design choice as well, why lock the new content behind busy work? Maybe later down the road I might feel compelled to unlock these levels, but right now I've better stuff to do.

 I'd love to be able to say that this is the definitive version of DKCR, I'd love to say that it fixed the unreliability of the motion controls.... but I can't. The new stuff? Locked behind busywork. The new control scheme? It has its own kinks. If you ask me, I'll stick with the original release, but either version will suffice, as both are great versions of the same great game.
 8.0 out of 10

Review #374: Dillon's Rolling Western

 Rolled me to sleep it did.

 Dillon's Rolling Western is an action/tower defense game that also happens to be pretty boring. It received a lot of publicity ever since it was first released, heck, somehow it managed to earn itself a sequel as well as a cameo in the prestigious Smash Bros franchise.

 Taking the role of Dillon the Armadillo, you must defend 10 different towns from attack. Each town will be under siege by Grocks throughout 3 days and you must stop them. Each day begins with you going out into mines, gathering minerals to fortify the town's walls, repair or equip different towers with weapons to aid you. After a few minutes it will turn dark, and you will have to defeat the Grocks. Towers will either weaken or destroy Grocks that pass through their crosshairs, but you'll have to do most of the work. Bumping into an enemy will take you into a small square arena where you will have to do battle with a few enemies, however, as you partake in these fights, the enemies will still be on the move, so you must be quick and efficient.

 The game is very repetitive and boring. While there are a bunch of different enemy types and ways to deal with them, everything takes a while to perform. After you roll into an enemy, to attack it, you can either grind on them, for bonus drops or perform slash attacks, which are stronger but won't reward you as much. Rolling around through the terrain should've been fun, but it feels like a drag... literally, as 90% of the controls rely on the Stylus. Regardless, the game does attempt to alleviate the tedium, every level introduces something new, be it a new attack, a new enemy or a new item, there's always something new waiting for you.... but it doesn't help! Stages take way too long to complete, Stylus-only controls are gimmicky and the enemy AI is simple.

 You can upgrade your equipment before each day, but equipment breaks frequently, so you must always invest more on upgrades that you lose, which manages to make you feel as if you are never progressing. It's not a fun mechanic, and if all your equipment breaks during a raid, you are all out of luck until you make it to the next day, if you make it to the next day. It will also force you to grind, y'see, unlocking new stages isn't simply a matter of beating the previous stage, you must also score high enough to earn stars. Initially, making it through with three stars out of five will cut it, but the final stage requires at least a four star ranking(assuming you got all threes), so if you are short of stars... you will have to replay another, long, boring stage and hope to make a better score. Idiotic.

 In short, Dillon's Rolling Western isn't very fun and the gameplay leaves something to be desired, but at least it's not an absolute mess of a game. For what it's worth, I think that maybe with some polishing, it could make for a good game, so maybe, maaaaaybe the sequel is a better game.
 4.0 out of 10

Review #373: Moon Diver

 It's a Square-Enix game, so of course it's gotta be presumptuous!

 You could say that I'm a bit of a fan of Strider, particularly Strider II. Moon Diver looked right up my alley, fast-paced, arcadey run-and-slash flashy gameplay. It was the first Digital-only game I felt like I had to had. It was also a disappointing mess that took me around 4 years of playing it sporadically and casually to finish.

 The game offers a 12-level romp as well as a 'chain-kill mode'(Free DLC update) and four playable characters at a base level, as well as Score attack and fifth, overpowered, character as paid DLC. The DLC extras feel a bit... cheap, both as ways to nickel and dime the player(Even if they only amount to two dollars) as well as the overpowered extra character considering how hard the game is.

 The game is fast-paced, that much is true, but it's also very, very repetitive. Enemies take a few hits to go down, and the feedback from your hits isn't satisfying at all. All five characters play more or less the same, but they have different stat growths as they level up, but all of them have the same exact spell-pool to pick from when setting up before a mission, so picking a character is mostly aesthetics. Speaking of stats, every time you level up you'll get a single stat point to invest on HP, Mana and Attack, but, honestly, except magic, increasing my HP and Attack power gave negligible results: Enemies would still take quite a few hits before going down, bosses still had to have their HP chipped away and I would go down in more or less the same few hits.

 The game is meant to be played by four players at the same time. I played the entire game as a co-op duo, and on the latter stages we had a bad, bad time. Anything short of four players will result in a very grindy, unfun experience. It's not a matter of skill when you are peppered with bullets and lasers left, right, front and center and enemies take so many hits to go down. We had to resort to cheeseing the game by exploiting respawns. And the last level is an absolute nightmare that has you fighting every single boss again while going through the same repeated areas. Disgusting.

 Level design is also pretty bad. It's as if they came up with the levels before deciding on how the game would play, as it's pretty easy for your characters to accidentally cling onto walls or ledges you didn't mean to. A game like this should have simple, responsive controls, but oh so many times it felt as if I was fighting the controls as well as the level design. It's not a good game.

 I did not like Moon Diver. I didn't even have fun writing about it. At least I can commend the developers on trying to imitate such a fantastic game as Strider 2, as there aren't many games like it. But the game is plagued with bad level design, clunky controls, repetitive and unsatisfying gameplay and a very unfair difficulty setting. My advice? Stick to Strider 2, stick to Strider, stick to Osman, but forget about Moon Diver.
 2.5 out of 10

Review #372: Tony Hawk's - Proving Ground

 Grey Hawk's Grey Ground.

 This is it, rather, this was it. The last traditional Tony Hawk game ever made before they decided to reboot the franchise with Pro Skater 5. Proving Ground is... more of the same, building upon some of the worst aspects of Project 8 while adding even more mechanics on top of the already plentiful amount that the series has amassed over the years. It's... it's understandable why it underperformed and Activision saw fit to reboot the franchise.

 There're only two main modes: Story and Multiplayer. The multiplayer offering has the usual suspects, so it's not worth delving into that, as it's same old, same old. Single Player is where it's at, however, as it's been the norm since Underground, the story follows your created skater, male only since it seems female characters became too expensive! You are thrust upon a very grey, dull looking open-world-ish city as you skate around looking for missions, which come in four varieties: Career and Hardcore, which are more or less your traditional Tony Hawk objectives, like amassing points or performing certain tricks over certain spots, Rigger, which involve altering the environment and Street, which are the same challenges from Project 8, that have you finding markers on the streets and walls and trying to figure out how to do them. There're also Arcade Machines with let you play the 2-minute, goal-based format from the first games in the franchise.

 There're certainly a whole bunch of stuff to do, but most if it isn't particularly fun. The difficulty follows the same scheme as Project 8, in which you can organically choose the difficulty for each objective by performing different things during the same mission, which is brilliant. Regardless, these missions feel very mundane in nature, with most of the punk-humor from previous games pretty much gone, aiming for realistic objectives, like taking pictures of your tricks. It doesn't help how grey and boring the entire world looks, every 'skate park' lacks personality, soul and color! It's not a fun place to skate around, even Project 8 had more distinctive looking environments.

 The game has also received a whole slew of tiny tweaks. Skaters no longer lean when you hold the X button, which is jarring to say the least, and some controls have been changed in order to make room for the new mechanics, so long time players like myself may find themselves a bit annoyed at first, and, honestly, I don't think the new features were worth changing the controls. The first new addition is the Aggro Kick, done by pressing the R1 button rhythmically in order to build up speed, the game does a poor job at telling you how to perform it correctly, but eventually it becomes rather fun to pull off. L2 is used to hit NPCs, which is rather satisfying as well. 'Nail the Trick' has been expanded into Nail the Grab and Nail the Manual and... I didn't really care about them, but hey, new, easy ways to score points! Lastly, now you can slash-grind pools and carve them as well... and I couldn't care less about these two. Basically, nothing game-changing.

 The video-editing tools have been revamped and expanded upon, if you are into that, for whatever reason, and the create-a-park is back, but relegated to a single area, the Skate Lounge. That said, now you can add ramps and rails at your whim over the entire overworld, however, there's a limit to how many items you can add to the game's world, so you might have to remember where you put what so that you can remove it later down the line if you want to do more modifications. Be wary too, as the game tends to slow down when there's a lot going on at the same time.

 Proving Ground is... not as disappoint as it could've, since it's a follow-up to the already disappointing Project 8. Objectives are dull, the game's world is bland but at least the gameplay is top-notch, thanks to years of building upon what worked, although your mileage may vary on the new additions and tweaked controls. I think Project 8 was slightly more fun since it had a bit more personality, but either way you're better off playing the older games.
 6.0 out of 10

Review #371: Painkiller - Hell & Damnation

 Painkiller, with less levels, less enemies, less framerate and more graphics.

 What was Painkiller? It was a fantastic PC First Person Shooter that harkened back to the era of older FPS game, guns had no ammo clips, circle strafing was the norm and it was all about mowing down hundreds upon hundreds of demons. It was pretty dope, and it's one of my favorite games ever made. Quite a few expansion packs and spin offs would be developed, but they were pretty mediocre or downright bad, probably since, except Battle out of Hell, none of them were developed by the original team. Hell & Damnation doesn't break the trend, it's yet another disappointing attempt at milking everything they can out of the first game.

 While the story picks up after Battle out of Hell ended, the game doesn't contain a single new level, heck, 3 out of the 4 bosses are recycled from the first game. This is never addressed in the game, Daniel simply treads older ground, but doesn't seem to notice. Anyways, Daniel continues to be trapped in limbo, so Death offers him a deal: Gather 7000 souls and have Catherine resurrected. Simple, to the point, it's everything that a game like this needs. That said, I don't remember Daniel being such an immature tryhard prick, he is as unlikable as it gets, not surprisingly being voiced by the guy that voices Duke Nukem.

 First, the good news: This is Painkiller as you know it... more or less. This isn't Half-Life, there're no puzzles to be solved, it's just you, your weapons, and arenas filled to the brim with enemies. There's no regenerating health, but you can find gold souls to restore some health back, or pick up souls from fallen enemies to restore 1 hp a piece. Gathering 66 souls will turn you into an invulnerable demon for a few seconds, allowing you to easily lay waste on your enemies. Fulfilling certain conditions will unlock Tarot Cards, that can be equipped at the cost of some gold coins, found by destroying inanimate objects, that grant you all kinds of extra abilities.

 You are outfitted with only eight weapons, but each has two entirely different functions, so it feels more like eighteen weapons, with a few of them having a third function by pressing both buttons together. Hell and Damnation includes the first game's five weapons, Battle out of Hell's two additional weapons as well as the new Soul Cutter weapon, which is kinda cool... at the cost of the game's Signature weapon: The PainKiller. You seen, using the PainKillers main function, the melee shredder attack, doesn't feel half as satisfying as it once did, back in the original games, you could feel the the crunchy shredding of an enemy's body thanks to the audiovisual feedback, this time around, enemies feel like butter against it, lacking the crunchy sounds or the devastating feedback from before, heck, in order to make the Soul Cutter's main function useful... they had to nerf the PainKillers third attack. Basically, while using the PainKiller used to be fun, now it's disappointing, if I could, I avoided using it, since there was nothing for me in it.

 But let's get into why this fails as a remake: the back of the game's cover boasts that it's a remake of both Painkiller and Battle out of Hell. And it's a shameless lie, Painkiller had about 25 levels, Battle out of Hell added 10 more levels, Hell and Damnation has a paltry 13 levels. THIRTEEN LEVELS out of over 30. Granted, the PS3 version has an additional 14th level, only accessible through Level select. Want to play the missing levels? Gonna have to pony up some extra cash, since they're DLC. Levels have received minor changes, mainly to add the new ammo type for the Soul Cutter, or to accommodate for the new rate at which you acquire the weapons. Also, I'm pretty sure, but can't confirm, some of the enemy types are missing, since I don't remember the original game recycling these many enemy types. Oh, don't worry, you can have more enemy types if you buy the DLC!

 Another way in which this remake takes a hit is in the framerate. Painkiller used to run at a silky 60 fps, but Battle out of Hell runs at 30, with the occasional frame drop when it gets hectic or you use the flamethrower. Lastly, there's a local co-op mode, which makes the framerate suffer even more, as well as online VS modes, if you're into that.

 If you've never played the original Painkiller game, Hell and Damnation may seem like a pretty awesome game. It's a fast-paced, arcadey shooter that favors action over thinking, and emulates older FPS games, before they turned so generic and samey. But, if you have played the original game, then you will know what it's missing. So, it doesn't matter how good the game's foundations are, which are really good, the fact of the matter is that you can get original game at a much cheaper price, and get double the amount of levels. Heck, you can get Painkiller and Battle out of Hell and get everything this game has and more. At a cheaper price. Or you could get Painkiller: Black Edition, which contains everything Painkiller, at a cheaper price. So what if this game has HD graphics, it looks awful for its era and can't even run at a steady framerate. Disappointing.

 If they were gonna go about it this way, a much better idea would've been to make entirely new levels. Don't have the resources, or the will, to translate all the levels from the previous game? Then give us new levels. Sure, they run the risk of falling short of the original, but at least it would've been new content. Why do I want to play this game? I can play the SAME levels, at a faster framerate with the original games. And I get more levels to boot. This is easily the worst way to experience the magnificence that was the original Painkiller. The saddest part about it, is that when it gets down to the brass tacks, this is still Painkiller, it's got the same great gameplay as well as some of the best levels that the franchise has to offer, so at worst, you'll still be able to have a blast with the game... if you decide to get the barest Painkiller package possible.

 6.0 out of 10

Now Playing: Painkiller - Hell & Damnation

 All pain and no killer.

 Painkiller is one of my favorite games ever. Ever. And they went and screwed it up!

 Where do I begin? Let's start with what you can find out before starting the game: Only thirteen levels. The original release had about 25 levels. This game is, supposedly, a pseudo-remake of Painkiller and its first expansion, Battle out of Hell, which added 10 more levels. Do the math, the game is missing over half of the total stages. And if you want more levels? You gotta buy the DLC packs. SERIOUSLY????

 And then you start up the game... the graphics are hideous. Sure, they're a step up from the original game, but then again, that game is flippin' old. There're a few framerate issues every now and then too, which is inexcusable considering how bad it looks. I can either play the good looking, for its time, original game at a fluid 60 fps or play this new, horrible looking, for its time, remake at 30 fps.

 And they also screwed up the game's eponymous weapon, the Painkiller. Back in the PC original, nothing felt more crunchlingly satisfying than using the razor-sharp shredder Painkiller, but in this game it's like cutting through butter: No feedback, no crunchiness, no oomph.

 At least the game is still Painkiller, and it feels, mostly, like Painkiller.

Month Overview: January 2017

 Tally:
Guilty Gear Xrd -Revelator- 8.0
Disgaea 2 - Cursed Memories 7.5
Blazblue - CentralFiction 8.5
Bushido Blade 8.5
Tobal No.1 7.5
Battle Arena Toshinden 3 6.0
Metal Slug Anthology 8.0
Gekido - Urban Fighters 5.5
Star Wars Episode III - Revenge of the Sith 5.0
Catherine 8.5
Twisted Metal - Black 7.5

 That's a ton of games to start off the year! For whatever reason or whim, I decided to start with fighting games. A ton of fighting games. Some were good, some were decent, but none of them really disappointed... Although there were a few disappointments this month, for as fun as Metal Slug games are, this disc is plague with loading times, poor form SNK! And Revenge of the Sith, the game, looked SO good, but it was so average. It looked like one of the best Star Wars games, but it falls short of the visual spectacle it delivers.

 Game of January 2017:

 Catherine, baby! It was high time I played this little game, and it was everything I expected it to be. It's not perfect, and the gameplay is certainly not my cup of tea, but just as with the Danganronpa games, even though I disliked the gameplay, the story itself was SO good that it kept me going.

 Runner-up:

 This is surprising. I almost went with Bushido Blade 1, but as good as that game is, you can't deny that it's a bit lacking when it comes to content. And as much as I liked it, I don't think that it entirely overshadows Bushido Blade 2.... But then there's Blazblue CentralFiction. While character design is otaku-pandering garbage, and the story is convoluted to the point of being nonsensical under the cover of 'deep'.... the gameplay has been refined to a tee.

 There're over 30 characters already, all of them offering at least one unique game mechanic to his or herself, and this is the culmination of every game mechanic that has been piling up since Calamity Trigger, offering so many tools with every single character! CentralFiction delivered where it mattered the most.

Now Playing: Tony Hawk's Proving Ground

 Not my Tony Hawk...

 What the hell is wrong with this game? Upon booting up the game I was greeted with what seemed, and later proved down to be, a superior soundtrack to Project 8, as well as being pleasantly surprised but a better, but still lacking, character creator mode. So far, so good. And then the game starts... and Philly and Lower Philly lack any kind of personality. There's a new 'Aggro Kick' move which is rather awkward, but I think, I think I wound up liking it after I got the hang of it.

 The engine feels different. Again. Characters no longer lean downwards when holding X, which is rather jarring, and pulling off long combos seems easier than ever before, which is a plus in my book. Regardless, the skate parks lack personality, and I was rather miffled by the by-the-numbers goals I was presented with so far. I dunno, I'm not feeling this game.

 The soundtrack is kickass though.

Review #370: Twisted Metal Black

 Yet another twisted romp into the world of Twisted Metal.

 Twisted Metal Black had a lot riding behind it, the original team that developed the first games in the franchise were back, and now they had new hardware to bring their car-combat classic into the world. Even more twisted, darker, eviler and gritty than before, Twisted Metal Black is often considered the best in the franchise, but is it good enough to turn someone like me, who doesn't particularly like the formula, around? No, it's not, but does it try!

 There're quite a few ways to play the game: Story, Endurance(Survival) and Challenge(VS CPUs) modes for Single Player, as well as a few 2P VS and Co-Op deathmatch modes. The real beauty of the game lies in the stories surrounding the 15 members of the cast. 10 of these characters feature their own prologue, mid-scene and epilogue, while the remaining 4 only get an ending. Regardless, every story is sick and twisted which make them oh so enthralling, it makes you want to finish the annoying single player mode in order to get every piece of the story surrounding these sick, sick people.

 Just as with Twisted Metal(2011) and a few other Arcadey arena-combat games, Twisted Metal Black falls into the same pitfall: CPU enemies will ignore each other, for the most part, and just gang up on you. To be fair, it's not as bad as TM(2011) in which CPU wouldn't even scratch each other, but it's still pretty bad. It doesn't help that a lot of the unlockables are hidden in very guide-dang-it places, and some require a degree of finesse that is hard to achieve when you are being constantly bombarded left, right and center. To be honest, I just activated cheats and unlocked stuff at my leisure. I'm not even ashamed of it, the game is unfair to the point of tedium and the unlockables feel like little more than a way to sell guides, so if the game won't respect me, I won't respect it either.

 In the game's defense, combat feels pretty nice and the game runs at a smooth framerate. While I think combat and movement felt a bit tighter and crunchier in the 2011's remake, I think controls, as a whole, are easier to grasp in this game. I just grabbed the joystick and instantly clicked with them, not so much as with 2011. That said, there're a few shortcomings, namely concerning the Special attacks, which are done with slightly complicated, since you have to remember them by heart, directional inputs that are hidden away in the instructions booklet.

 Besides having more vehicles and stories than its successor, the game has better levels, in my opinion, as well. They suffer a bit from the brown-color-palette syndrome, but considering the dark world of Twisted Metal, it kinda works. That aside, the levels are brilliant, so much so that a few were remade in 2011. The only bad level would be the Skyscrapers, since some downward ledges are impossible to see, making it for very treacherous roads, unfairly so.

 Twisted Metal Black is a fantastic game IF you've friends that like the genre. Me? I can tell that a lot of effort was put into the game, and that if you enjoy drawn-out battles that take forever thanks to having to go around the levels over and over again to get more ammo in order to do slightly more damage while your prey escapes to fill its health gauge back up.... Yeah, I really don't like this game. But hey, different strokes for different folk!
 7.5 out of 10

Now Playing: Twisted Metal Black

 At least I got my War of the Monsters Sweet Tooth skin, right? Right?!

 I really don't like Twisted Metal, and after finishing Black with both Sweet Tooth and Junkyard Dog... I still feel the same way. I'm sure there's an audience for these games, mainly people that like car-based combat games and play it with other people. But I don't like Car-based combat games nor do I know people that can stomach it, and even then, I get bored eventually. The problem? Single Player mode is terrible, because all seven CPU opponents ignore each other and focus on you. Fun.

 I also cheated and unlocked everything story mode has. And I'm not even ashamed of it, trying to grab these while getting blasted constantly? I'm not a masochist.

 For what it's worth, there're great things about the game. The dark story and the fantastic levels... but I simply don't like the game. At least I finally got the last War of the Monsters skin that was tied to Twisted Metal Black's save file!